Return To Bottle Wolfenstein

<Holden> so where are we sitting on that project to beef up chancel security, anyway?

<Elliott> project or Project?

<Holden> Project, we declared it a Project last week

<Elliott> Ah

<Elliott> :p

<RandBrittain> You're sitting on needing to do stuff!

<RandBrittain> You should decide on some stuff!

<Hollyhock God> Please begin deciding now!

<Elliott> I vote for chasing down Abhorrent Weapons

<Elliott> That's always a sensible course of action.

<Hollyhock God> You could empower some of your servants.

<Hollyhock God> Persona is useful for that!

<Hollyhock God> "Henceforth, banana-flavored lollipops will transform you into a heavily-armed Navy SEAL for an hour!"

<Jane> brb

<Nico> Nico's probably going to be trying to invent candy angels

<Hollyhock God> Or some more generic "you shall be a guardian of Halloween" effect.

<Damiani-phone> But I can't be proactive! I don't know what my project is!

<Damiani-phone> … At least not pic

<Damiani-phone> IOC

<Damiani-phone> IOC

<Damiani-phone> Out of character. Stupid iPhone

<Nico> …Graaaaahblargle

<Nico> I can't swing a Binding without a Word of Command.

<Jane> back

<Jane> me either

<Nico> Maybe it's worth it?

<Nico> Although I can only swing it in the Chancel

<Nico> Because some of us don't have a billion MP

<Jane> Yeah you guys are weird like that

<Nico> :(

<Nico> Hmmmm

<Nico> How to use my evil Treasure powers to protect the Chancel?

  • Hollyhock God yogurts as you consider.

<Hollyhock God> At the very least you should have some loyal monsters who at least become named characters.

<Jane> How to use my crappy persona rating to make it into a less-crappy Persona rating…

<Jane> also how do you raise Aspect?

<Jane> I kinda get that getting deeply involved in my Estate will help with Persona, but Aspect is like, what? Do I just bench-press mountains?

<Hollyhock God> Refine your holiday spirit with dangerous alchemical elixirs!

<Hollyhock God> Seek to increase your perfection by being worshipped as the Halloween goddess.

<Hollyhock God> Ask Nico to make a strength-increasing chocolate and put up with the side effects for so long as I consider it amusing!

<Hollyhock God> Anything that increases your iconic status!

<Hollyhock God> Other things that might help out in the Chancel: booby traps.

<Hollyhock God> Ghostly gun turrets, and so forth!

<Jane> perhaps we should attempt to capture Godzilla for chancel security

<Jane> he has never been defeated, except by King Kong, and that was bullshit

<Hollyhock God> I fear that we cannot proceed this evening until you have defined five Chancel features that will serve you in this respect.

<Nico> Nico's going to be fortifying the Chancel's structures with murderholes and inventing a terrible, molten chocolate that never cools. Like sweet, sickening napalm.

<Nico> It also contains essence of ghost peppers.

<Hollyhock God> What do ghost peppers do?

<Jane> Jane's been organizing strategic hauntings and monster patrols, and also empowering select monsters into super monsters.

<Nico> Ghost peppers are just freakishly hot peppers.

<Jane> (although she's painfully aware that a super-monster and a regular monster are both kinda useless vs miracles)

<Nico> …can I make giant, living Peeps ala Erfworld?

<Hollyhock God> Yes, why not?

<Nico> Then flocks of Peeps we shall have!

<Hollyhock God> I think a helpful thing is to define specific and cool monsters and hauntings.

<Hollyhock God> Insofar as that encourages the HG to remember that they're about the next time Anselin comes by to drop a flashback.

<Hollyhock God> Where are these murderholes going, anyway?

<Nico> In every building. They're all manned by gargoyles.

<Jane> also watch-gargoyles all over the house in the middle of the chancel

<Hollyhock God> Maybe you can find a very angry ghost, and assign it to a room in the house.

<Hollyhock God> Then just warn your servants not to go in there.

<Hollyhock God> Label it "Free Brownie Room"

<Nico> The Yagas are a small family of withered witch-things that live in a small hovel just behind the Mansion. They're not actually all Slavic; at least two are French and one is Finnish. They want, more than anything, children. Specifically, braised children with a side of pasta.

<Hollyhock God> Do they have a mortar and pestle? That's important.

<Jane> I think we've got Baba Yaga coordinating monster patrols from her roving chicken-legged hut command center in the outer part of the Chancel

<Nico> While they're pretty morally horrible, they're also definitionally helpful neighbors with a curious strong civic spirit.

<Hollyhock God> These things work well together!

<Hollyhock God> A horribly helpful band of witches who are your middle management.

<Nico> They should all be very jokey about child-eating to Pascale

<Nico> And then Pascale turns her back and they get all murderous

<Nico> Until the rest of us glare at them disapprovingly

<Hollyhock God> Ah, like Count Blood Count.

<Jane> we also have houses packed full of zombies for use as surprise-deployment shock troops and reinforcements

<Jane> this is occasionally highly unpleasant when some ghoul or vampire or other is looking for a place to crash and they open the door and bam

<Jane> it's like one of those novelty peanut cans full of snakes

<Jane> only it's a house, and zombies

<Hollyhock God> Playhouse of the Dead!

  • Pascale (||crivk) has joined #SpookyGods

<Nico> Also, in the River that runs along the chancel, we might have a kraken addicted to pixie sticks laced with cocaine.

<Hollyhock God> Meanwhile, you've also been doing various architectural things.

<ADamiani|2> (Apologies for my tardiness)

<Hollyhock God> Reinforcing walls of plaster with steel and frozen chocolate.

<Jane> (it's cool we're still waiting on you and Vance)

<Hollyhock God> Oh, and one room? The floor tiles are all sitting on marshmallows, so they tip you into the spike pit.

<Jane> I've also been enforcing around-the-clock Halloween decorations

<Pascale> Xoxing habit. My tabletop is Transhuman Space.

<Hollyhock God> Most of the tchotchkes are haunted.

<Jane> which, for Jane, fulfills the same function as ammo caches

<Jane> yes

<Pascale> Yes. Obviously, this weirds Pascale out quite a bit.

<Pascale> On account of, you know, living in the set of Beetlejuice.

<Jane> More like Halloween Town

<Jane> either way, probably best not to get on the Estate of Disney's bad side right now

<Hollyhock God> But like I said, architecture

<Jane> does Nobilis have any rules for two Nobles combining their powers cooperatively?

<Hollyhock God> In 2e you could combine your powers to get +1 miracle level.

<Pascale> Hm. Game of Powers used to.

<Hollyhock God> I'm not sure how that works in 3e.

<Jane> I feel like there's some un-leveraged potential for candy corn vampires we're overlooking

<Pascale> Technically, the anchor rules allow it with L8 Treasure miracles if you have another power as an anchor…

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, your ghost butler brings you some news.

<Jane> is it news about where the hell Vance is?

<Hollyhock God> (You have a spook butler, a dracula butler, and a wolfenstein butler.)

<Nico> Vance is in the air

<Hollyhock God> The ghouls working on remodeling the South Room have found… a can.

<Nico> Or getting luggage

<Peanut_Gallery> (Is he a werewolf or a nazi werewolf?)

<Hollyhock God> He's probably just a werewolf.

<Jane> A can! What sort of can?

<Pascale> Pascale looks away, knowingly.

<Pascale> … it's more of a reflex at this point than anything.

<Hollyhock God> A soda can, in a room which had previously been secret and walled off.

<Hollyhock God> It had been left, announces Ectington, on a little table.

<Hollyhock God> The table also contained-he says this with great sadness-half of a bar of dark chocolate with raspberries.

<Hollyhock God> This, as you know, was the favored candy of a certain Former Incumbent.

<Hollyhock God> The can is sealed with a small cork.

<Hollyhock God> Ectington has placed it under guard.

<Jane> …who seals a soda can with a cork? I mean, you'd usually use cling wrap and a rubber band for that.

<Hollyhock God> Probably some ancient blood sorcerer.

<Hollyhock God> They're weird guys.

<Pascale> Can I divspam this thing for whatever secrets it contains?

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, the *last* time you found something Toltecatl sealed up in a secret room, it destroyed the music room and you're honestly not sure where it went.

<Hollyhock God> You may!

<Pascale> I do!

  • Hollyhock God hands Pascale an AMP.
  • Jane looks curiously to Nico. "Any ideas?"

<Pascale> (AMP, specifically?)

<Hollyhock God> Sure, why not?

<Hollyhock God> It is my helpfulness speaking, I assure you.

<Hollyhock God> You may need to dodge something in the near future!

<Pascale> "Ah. Jane, you might want to handle that one yourself."

<Pascale> "Very. Carefully."

  • Jane ponders.
  • Nico Nico looks up from where he's sitting in another room, as if deeply disturbed.

<Hollyhock God> It's probably got the Blob in it. Or the Thing.

<Jane> "Very well. I assume it's something dangerous?"

<Pascale> Pascale shrugs, and looks nonchalantly away, while simultaneously pulling out a large silver mace from somewhere behind her back and offering it to Jane.

  • Jane accepts. "Could you round up Nico while I head over to check this out? Thanks." And without waiting for an answer, she heads off to scope out this quarrantined room.

<Hollyhock God> The small one-legged table sits in the center of the cobwebbed room.

<Jane> Div/Sight-checking it on the way down, of course— see if it has anything to do with Halloween.

<Hollyhock God> The bottle and the half-bar of chocolate loom sinisterly in your sight.

<Hollyhock God> There may possibly be some kind of monster in it.

<Hollyhock God> Like maybe a giant werewolf.

  • Jane checks the cobwebs for occupants. "Any of you been around long enough to have seen who left this stuff here, or why, or anything like that?"

<Jane> I figure Conversations with spiders would be kosher for Halloween

<Hollyhock God> The spiders agree—-it's been there since the time of the ancients!

<Pascale> (That's a greater Div, right?)

<Jane> That's rather ominous. Then again, how long do spiders live? That could be like six months for all Jane knows.

<Hollyhock God> Just talking is more like a Conversation.

<Hollyhock God> Yeah, probably not all that long.

<Jane> (no, just a Conversation. Quizzing spiders lol)

  • Jane leans over the can and the cork. She picks up the can, gives it a slight experimental shake.

<Hollyhock God> The can is surprisingly heavy.

<Hollyhock God> The contents slosh weirdly in a way you can't recall having seen before.

<Nico> (sorry, one sec)

  • Jane puts it back down, now convinced that it contains, at the very least, some kind of werewolf or aztec werejaguar, and quite possibly an endless torrent of hungry world-devouring bloodchocolate.

<Jane> "Hm."

<Jane> "Ah well, it was a dull evening anyway." Jane pops the cork.

<Hollyhock God> Werewolf sprays in your face!

<Pascale> Pascale rounds up Nico, per Jane's request, while Jane fights cocoa-cola classic.

<Hollyhock God> Imagine that you shook up a bottle of Coca-Cola (real-sugar Mexican variety obv.) and opened it.

<Nico> Nico stares up at Pascale, eyes wide and terrified. "Something terrible is happening."

<Hollyhock God> Now imagine that instead of soda, the bottle is full of the biggest werewolf you ever saw.

  • Jane ducks the spray of giant werewolf, then turns, still fingering the mace. "Oh wow, you're a big one."

<Hollyhock God> Even when it happens right in front of you, it's hard to explain how a giant wolf-man gets out of a bottle, but it happened.

<Hollyhock God> "So I am," admits the werewolf proudly. "Now, give me what I was promised!"

<Jane> Jane pauses, having expected a reply more in the "ARROOOOOOOOOHRUALAULGUGLHUGH" vein. She re-adjusts her expectations. This is clearly much more troublesome. "And what is it you were promised, and by whom?"

<Pascale> "Yep." Pascale nods to Nico.

<Pascale> "You wanna talk about it?"

<Hollyhock God> "It was you! You promised me my weight in gold, and a dozen delectable young virgins!"

<Nico> "Not really," Nico said. He snapped the book shut in his lap and then smiles. "Although not talking with you about it is just like talking with you about it."

<Hollyhock God> Indeed! Spill what you're not spilling!

  • Jane squints. "When was this?" While Jane's quite foggy on everything out past about eight years ago, that doesn't sound to her like the sort of promise she'd make.

<Pascale> "Pretty much." Pascale nods, giving Nico a sympathetic look. "But sometimes it helps to say."

<Hollyhock God> "Just a minute ago! You said if I climbed into the bottle, you'd give me my heart's desire, and I said that was a dozen virgins and my weight in gold, and you said that was fine, just fine, and so I did.

<Nico> Nico sighs, long and loud and low. "Just the usual Power drama. Also, I feel a great disturbance in the force! Or…like…in my ghost. Is that subject-changey enough?" he added with a smile.

<Hollyhock God> "And then you kept me waiting for quite a while."

<Hollyhock God> "Like, maybe twenty minutes. That's not what I call sporting."

  • Jane squints. "What did… er, do you recall what I looked like at the time? Hair, especially?" Once upon a time, Jane had kept the habit of alternating tu-tone hair dyes, black and some garish primary color, changing it up about every six months. Ever since being ennobled, only black-and-orange seems to stick.

<Pascale> (Naturally, I'm Firing off divinations at whatever Nico's keeping secret, assuming they're not already affliction-OK)

<Pascale> "You know, a couple hours ago, I found out something I didn't know?" Pascale takes a seat next to Nico. "You remember when the Excrucians did the mindscape thing to us, back on Halloween. Or. Christmas. Whichever?"

<Hollyhock God> "Honestly, you little humans all kind of look the same."

<Hollyhock God> "But you had the two arms, and a head, and a torso full of fluids, and were spooky. Obviously the same guy."

<Hollyhock God> Obviously it is up to Elliot to reveal what Nico's secrets are.

<Nico> "I remember. Yeah. So?"

<Hollyhock God> Good opportunity to work on a Struggle, BTW.

<Nico> I am still confused by Struggles

<Jane> "Well," Jane says, "for starters, I'm not a guy. But I think I know the fellow you're talking about." And she sends a good decent chill up in Nico's direction.

<Jane> I am still confused by Struggles as well.

<Pascale> "Ancelin rummaged through our brains, right? And showed us bits from our pasts? Me, he was hovering over with surgical equipment, and talking about 'who can ever *really* know what it's like to be somebody else?'?"

<Hollyhock God> You find a troubling problem, and you wrestle with it.

<Hollyhock God> Either via angst, or by poking at it with Science, or whatever.

<Hollyhock God> But generally you give it screen time.

<Hollyhock God> I think the Chuubo Issue rules are a clearer explanation of how that kind of thing should work.

<Pascale> "Except… those are things like qualia. They're inherently uncommunicable, unknowable— 'what Red really looks like to you' sorts of things."

<Nico> Nico's bothered by Toltecatl, and feels like a failure. He has barely any control over his Estate, and what powers he does have are almost universally leftovers from the Incumbent.

<Pascale> "… turns out they count as secrets."

<Hollyhock God> yessssss wrestle with this question

<Hollyhock God> you are a poor helpless abyssal and this question is the 2e resonance rules

<Pascale> "… so what faux-Ancelin was saying doesn't make sense. Quite aside from the surgical equipment. I actually *can*."

<Hollyhock God> 'What *does* it mean to be somebody else and not you' is also a good problem for Struggling with.

<Hollyhock God> Albeit a more empirical one.

<Pascale> "Aside from which, seeing the experiential essence of other people is *really* messed-up experience. I strongly reccomend you avoid it."

<Pascale> "… so there? I shared."

<Pascale> "You?

<Nico> Nico feels a shiver up his spine, and then another: one for Pascale, brought on by youth and insight; the other for Jane. "I'll keep that in mind."

<Jane> how about "to what degree do I inherit moral responsibility for this monster I just unleashed?"

<Pascale> Pascale looks to Nico, like it's his turn to share, maybe.

<Nico> "Don't you know already? And really, we should find Jane. Something feels…I don't know. Lupine? Like, a lupine scent. More lupine than normal."

<Hollyhock God> That works, although I think it would work better on a more general level.

<Jane> probably so

<Jane> but hey, small steps

<Hollyhock God> How responsible you are for any evil stuff your monsters do when they slip your leash.

<Pascale> ((Pascale may know. *I* do not.))

<Jane> "So okay, here's the problem," Jane says.

<Pascale> "Oh, that's just the thing. Don't worry. It's secretly weak versus silver."

<Hollyhock God> Is that weakness a silver?

<Hollyhock God> I mean, a secret?

<Nico> Nico looks at Pascale like he's trying to find a crack in armor. "So, here's a question for you, Pas. When I didn't want to tell you what was wrong…how did you respond?"

<Pascale> (ooc When did this happen?)

<Nico> (Wait what? I am confused)

<Jane> She counts off on her fingers. "First, the guy who promised you that stuff isn't me. Second, he's dead, although his ghost is still around. Third, you were in there a lot longer than like twenty minutes. Fourth, I'm pretty sure you've been hornswoggled. And fifth, while the mound of gold might be do-able, maybe, we're definitely not going to be coughing up the virgins. Maybe we can work something else out."

<Pascale> (I'm confused about Nico's line)

<Hollyhock God> He means, just now, he said he didn't want to talk about it.

<Nico> (You asked me what was wrong)

<Hollyhock God> And your response was to pry.

<Pascale> (Yes…. and?)

<Hollyhock God> "How will I feed my children without a dozen virgins?" questions the wolf.

<Nico> (…Didn't you use a Div?)

<Pascale> (Rand isn't letting that resolve for some reason, so I'm reduced to pumping you for information and leaving ambiguous how much she already knows and how much is because it's her nature to pry)

<Jane> "…Beef?" Jane suggests. "Wait, you have children?"

<Nico> (I am so confused)

<Hollyhock God> The divination resolved; I just don't have information on Nico's feelings.

<Hollyhock God> Only Elliot can give you that!

<Nico> That's why I said things!

<Hollyhock God> Yes.

<Nico> I feel like I'm taking crazy pills.

<Hollyhock God> "Twelve strong and handsome sons! The princes of Atlantis!"

<Jane> Jane opens her mouth to reply to that, leaves it hanging there for a while while she processes that.

<Jane> "…You're the werewolf king of Atlantis?"

<Pascale> (I'm confused too.)

<Jane> (Man you're not as confused as me, I'm talking to the Werewolf King of Atlantis.)

<Nico> (I thought he wanted to EAT the princes?)

<Pascale> (No, he wants the virgins to feed to his kids, the princes of Atlantis?)

<Nico> (Ah, yes)

<Nico> (…I hope feed here is metaphorical)

<Hollyhock God> "Of course! Wolfen men have ruled Atlantis for eons!"

<Hollyhock God> (Atlantis was destroyed long ago; werewolves never ruled it. Just in case you were wondering.)

<Pascale> (Oh. Just when things were getting clearer….)

<Pascale> "What do you mean, how did I respond?"

<Hollyhock God> Exactly what is going to happen to these virgins remains unclear.

<Jane> How is "I have to feed my kids" unclear?

<Peanut_Gallery> (Can't you just give him virgin pigs? You failed to specify the species.)

<Hollyhock God> What does it mean for anything to mean anything?

<Pascale> (…. they could have the affliction 'can only eat food prepared by virgins'?)

<Nico> "I mean…what did you do?" Nico says, looking up. "How did you respond? I'm not accusing you, Pas, at least not out of any bad feelings. But when you don't know something, what do you do?"

<Pascale> "I usually ask."

<Nico> Nico smiles. "And when asking doesn't work? What's it like, Pas? Just knowing secrets? Having them always be…a thought away."

<Pascale> "Less than that, really, Nico. I mean—- I know things I didn't want to know, didn't ask to know. Because I AM those things, you know?"

<Nico> "But you're still something. Something that's not just a remnant," Nico says at last. "C'mon. We should find Jane. Who knows what trouble she's getting herself into. Well, I mean, I guess you could, if she's hiding it," he adds, ruffling Pascale's hair

<Jane> (sorry phone rang, back)

<Jane> (gah)

<Pascale> Pascale laughs. "One day, I promise, you'll understand the irony."

<Hollyhock God> Nico and Pascale find Jane ensconced with the wolfen-king of Atlantis.

<Jane> Popping that particular bubble seems a bit premature. "Okay, let's try starting this over. Hi, I'm Jane Booth, Queen of Halloween. And you are…?" Her eyes tick down to the candy bar, checking to see if the bite-mark on it looks like human teeth or uh, wolfy teeth.

<Hollyhock God> Osgarth the Great!

<Hollyhock God> The chocolate apppears to have been gnawed by human teeth.

<Jane> Okay so no mind-altering chocolate. Probably.

<Nico> "Oh Cneph what did you do I don't even want to—"

<Hollyhock God> Nico instantly places it as Toltecatl's work via his sweet dentistry powers.

<Nico> Nico's standard dramatics follow.

<Jane> "Okay. Nico, Pascale, this is Osgarth. Osgarth, my familia. Nico, -someone- appears to have promised this fellow his weight in gold and a dozen virgins. And also to have given him the idea that he is the sovereign lord of Atlantis." Unspoken: HELP.

<Hollyhock God> And put him in a bottle!

<Hollyhock God> Don't forget that part.

<Nico> "Of…course he is the sovereign lord of Atlantis," Nico lies, quick as an extremely clever mongoose covered in butter. "Can't you see it? In his…regal bearing."

<Hollyhock God> "I am totally the sovereign lord of Atlantis," says Osgarth.

<Hollyhock God> "Exactly," says Osgarth, flexing. His wolfen-shape recedes a bit, leaving him somewhat more manlike and naked.

<Hollyhock God> "Truly, the form of a king!"

<Hollyhock God> Curious ghosts begin to congregate around this spectacle.

<Hollyhock God> Most of your wolfensteins are a bit shy.

<Nico> "…Dare I ask who promised these thing?" Nico ventures, timidly.

<Hollyhock God> "It was this man!" Osgarth exclaims, pointing an arm dramatically at Jane.

<Hollyhock God> "Woman, sorry."

<Hollyhock God> "Anyway it was her. I wouldn't make such an easy mistake!"

<Jane> "I think we know who around here is in the habit of bartering in gold and virgins," Jane sighs.

<Nico> "…Pascale. You know how I was very recently chiding you about certain abilities and talents and options?" Nico asks without breaking eye contact with Osgarth. "I don't suppose you could, you know?"

<Pascale> Pascale looks away, with that fake nonchalance.

<Nico> "Check Wikipedia? Shake the Magic 8-ball?"

<Pascale> (her response was to Jane's comment, not Nico's!)

<Pascale> "You already know the answer, don't you?"

<Jane> "I am still confused about the king of Atlantis bit," Jane points out.

<Nico> "Well, I was hoping for details. Maybe background. But I mean…do you guys want me to do some juju and get him out for questioning?"

<Hollyhock God> "Juju might upset my delicate royal constitution."

<Nico> Nico begins to suspect why Toltecatl might imprison this fellow.

<Nico> And begins wondering if he could replicate the feat.

  • Jane meanwhile is already thinking she's found a new head of werewolf security. Maybe.

<Pascale> "We're not…. seriously, goimg to give him…. you know?" Pascale whispers to her familia.

<Nico> "No," Nico ventures. "We're not monsters, no matter how many we employ."

<Hollyhock God> You might have some evil virgins somewhere!

<Nico> Awkward, evil, virgin mummies.

<Hollyhock God> They couldn't find boyfriends because they committed too many crimes.

<Jane> "Could you excuse us for just one moment?"

<Jane> (damn the slowness of yogurt!)

<Pascale> * * * The Family Absents themselves * * * ?

<Jane> * * * The Dude Abides * * *

<Hollyhock God> Oh, sorry, I thought you were absenting yourself on your own.

<Jane> dammit rand!

<Nico> "So."

<Hollyhock God> His Majesty graciously allows you to conference among yourselves.

<Hollyhock God> Well, yogurt happens!

<Jane> "So okay seriously, what is this Atlantis thing? Sticking a werewolf in a Coke can I can understand, kind of."

<Nico> "…you can understand that?"

<Nico> Nico looks flummoxed; at least, moreso than usual. "…Remind me to make Toltecatl do something really embarrassing and menial. Like…like…ironing laundry."

<Jane> "The whole chancel's kind of a giant cosmic coke can in a sense, yeah," Jane admits.

<Nico> "What does that even mean?"

<Jane> "It means Pascale why the hell does this guy think he's king of Atlantis?"

<Pascale> (As soon as Rand tells me…)

<Jane> "Actually, you know what, let me see what I can see for myself real quick." She pulls out a chair and sits down so as to avoid falling down, and then, well—

<Jane> Jane decides to be the werewolf for a few minutes.

<Pascale> Pascale opens her mouth to say something, and stops.

<Nico> Jane: Be the werewolf.

<Pascale> She considers.

<Pascale> "Nico, can I have a can of something sweet? Coke, maybe?"

<Jane> (Persona 2, free in Chancel)

<Hollyhock God> You are now the werewolf king of Atlantis.

<Hollyhock God> Also naked.

<Jane> Is it liberating?

<Hollyhock God> You are smug in the perfection of your physical form.

<Pascale> "In a green glass bottle, if you please?"

<Jane> Sweet. How else am I feeling?

<Hollyhock God> Others might consider you too hairy, but you know better!

<Hollyhock God> You desire to return home to your royal children in noble Atlantis.

<Hollyhock God> You think you may have left the TV on.

<Nico> Nico pulls a glass bottle of fizzy red drink from thin air, complete with crazy straw. "Here. It's made from four kinds of nectar that shouldn't exist and it tastes like being in air conditioning on the hottest day of summer."

<Jane> Can I quietly nudge myself into directly contemplating my Atlantean history?

<Pascale> "No, has to be a bttle."

<Pascale> (Er, sealed)

<Pascale> (Actually, the straw might not be in it.)

<Hollyhock God> You don't need much encouragement!

<Pascale> Pascale shakes the bottle vigorously.

<Jane> Then it's a-contemplating we will go!

<Pascale> Then she hands the bottle to Nico.

<Hollyhock God> The bottle fizzes with carbonation and chemical stuff!

<Hollyhock God> Your mind drifts back to wolfen-kings of old and their great deeds.

<Nico> "…"

<Pascale> Pascale gestures, as if this answers his question.

<Hollyhock God> This list of deeds is surprisingly detailed, like a real thing would be.

<Jane> what about my own kingly deeds?

<Nico> Nico's hand becomes stickier as it is covered in soda.

<Hollyhock God> This list is likewise long and noble!

<Pascale> Pascale gestures from the fizzy-drink bottle foam to the werewolf-bottle.

<Jane> and troublingly real?

<Hollyhock God> Were you mechanically inclined, you would rate yourself as having Skill: Wolfen-King 3e.

<Pascale> Pascale looks to Nico to see if he understands?

<Hollyhock God> Yes, somewhat realish.

<Jane> only somewhat?

<Hollyhock God> Real enough!

<Nico> Nico gets the straw in his mouth after one or two half-hearted tries, then sips. He's not really terrible bright, sometimes.

<Pascale> ((I'm assuming she's beholden here to the Knows-More-than-she's-saying affliction))

<Hollyhock God> Also Superior Wolfenstein 2.

<Jane> It seems like a good time for a superior wolfenstein to contemplate the events that led to this current situation.

<Jane> In a superior manner.

<Hollyhock God> Obviously, you were travelling the world on affairs of state, when you met a magical sorceror!

<Jane> obviously! Then what?

<Hollyhock God> He offered you the desire of your noble heart if you could but satisfy his curiosity in re: werewolves fitting inside a bottle.

<Hollyhock God> So you deftly climbed inside!

<Hollyhock God> You're a bit unclear about exactly how you did this.

<Jane> and why exactly did I need the 12 virgins? (The need of kings for more gold is of course self-explanatory)

<Hollyhock God> It's not really a normal wolfenstein power.

<Hollyhock God> You were a bit peckish, and you have twelve princely sons to feed, each more handsome than the last.

<Hollyhock God> You aren't quite sure what a virgin is, but you are assured that they are the most delicious human.

<Jane> Jane: Stop being the werewolf.

<Hollyhock God> You are now Jane Booth.

  • Jane stirs in her seat. "Okay," she says, "Toltecatl's powers didn't include like… total mind-rewriting, right?"

<Hollyhock God> Chocolate can be a bit mind-blowing but it's true that it wasn't his general MO.

<Nico> "I dunno," Nico says. "I mean, he was pretty crazy old and pretty crazy strong in his Estate and pretty crazy crazy, you know? So…maybe?"

  • Jane feels a bit more self-conscious of her status as the Queen of Halloween. Also, somewhat averse to the notion of shaving her legs.

<Nico> "But I'd wager it's probably not in his usual baliwick."

<Hollyhock God> Jane B., Scream Queen!

<Jane> "Well, the crazy I can definitely buy. As far as I can tell that is in fact the werewolf king of Atlantis— which I seem to recall both doesn't exist and didn't have werewolf nobility— and Toltecatl canned him more or less for the hell of it. Pascale. Help."

<Pascale> Pascale taps the bottle.

<Pascale> Pascale gives a pleading look, like, how much more obvious do I need to make it?!

<Nico> Much.

<Jane> what, did he carbonize under pressure?

  • Jane gives a similarly blank stare.

<Nico> "…I could just summon him."

<Jane> Perhaps charades are in order.

<Nico> "I mean. He's a terrible former person."

<Nico> "And he's as helpful as a pantload of bloodthirsty kittens…"

<Pascale> Pascale facepalms! "What happens when you put something in a bottle and shake it around?"

<Nico> "But still. That's on the table."

<Nico> "It gets fizzy?"

<Pascale> "Exactly."

<Jane> I didn't shake it THAT hard!

<Hollyhock God> You totally did.

<Jane> I totally did not!

<Hollyhock God> You can't just shake a person like that!

<Nico> "…Do people REALLY work that way?"

<Pascale> Pascale nods.

<Hollyhock God> It's not surprising at all that doing so disrupts his personal continuity!

<Jane> It was "a slight experimental shake," not whipping the thing around like a set of maracas!

<Nico> "So. How do we fix him?"

<Pascale> "It's not YOU, Jane."

<Pascale> Pascale looks to Jane as if reading her mind.

  • Jane scowls. "Moral of story: Toltecatl is a dick."

<Hollyhock God> Why did that window close?

<Hollyhock God> Did I miss anything?

  • Jane pinches her temples. "Can't you… I don't know… de-carbonate him?"

<Nico> "Toltecatl is totally a dick," Nico agrees.

<Pascale> "And by 'it's not you, I mean…'

<Pascale> "Well, it's like this."

<Nico> "…de-carbonate? Sure. Let me just go do some science to him. Except that I'm terrible at science."

<Pascale> "Estate properties of bottles include: Bottles can contain things. Bottles have a mouth… and things shaken in bottles, welll…." she sticks her finger in some of the fizz stuck on the side of the bottle and brings it up to demonstrate.

<Nico> A realization passes over Nico, as deep and unsettling as a cloud of noxious sulfur. "So. I totally know a potion for showing someone their past. But it's kind of meant as a terrible form of psychological torture."

<Jane> "Well we don't want THAT. Let me see if I can try something."

  • Jane concentrates for a few moments, and then tries to strengthen the fundamental self-ness of the werewolf in its truest state. (Lesser Preservation)

<Jane> (this might be stretching the boundaries of my Estate if it turns out he's not really a werewolf or something)

<Hollyhock God> Osgarth becomes even *more* kingly. He shines with naked regality.

<Hollyhock God> And hair. Shiny shiny hair.

  • Jane finds herself openly admiring his kingly bearing and luxuriant hair. Oh God, what. She stops with the Lesser Preservation.

<Pascale> Pascale is trying to look anywhere but Jane right now.

<Jane> "Okay that didn't work. Everything I've tossed at him says his crazy story checks out."

<Nico> "…Fine. We're going to the horse's mouth, then."

  • Jane also decides to be way more discerning in what she inhabits in the future.

<Nico> Nico excuses himself to the Summoning Foyer, a wide, well-reinforced room with lovely pentagram area rugs.

<Pascale> Pascale shrugs, looking at the ceiling. "Why question it? He's *wrong*, but it's not hurting him. Maybe he's happier this way."

  • Nico pricks his finger and lets a single drop fall to the center of the rug. Followed in quick succession by a few more, which surprises him. "Toltecatl, Once-Lord of Chocolate, appear before me in obeissance and…tell me shit."

<Nico> (Treasure 7, getting some miraculous help)



<Nico> "I'd like to know what you did to…well, he's a kind of werewolf man you put in a can."

<Pascale> "I mean, sure, let him out of the bottle. And if you want to be nice, make sure he finds his family. But maybe he *prefers* to remember being king, and ruling a lost civilization, and having that…. nobility as part of his intrinsic nature, instead of just being a wild beast?"

<Jane> "Well yeah," Jane agrees, "I'd thought of that, but then what?"

<Jane> "Hell, does his family exist?"

<Pascale> "A long time ago."

  • Jane glances quickly at Pascale. That was an unusually straight answer. "How long ago?"

<Pascale> ooc Rand doesn't want to pin down a date for (reasons that make sense)

<Jane> months, years, centuries….

<Hollyhock God> OH, THAT GUY. EH HEH HEH.

<Pascale> "Before you were born. They're probably dead now. Though I suppose some werewolves can live a very long time."

<Pascale> (At least decades)

<Pascale> (How long has Toltecatl been dead?)

<Hollyhock God> Two years, maybe?


<Nico> "Halloween did it. So…what's his deal?"

<Pascale> How much aspect sensory stuff does Jane regularly use?

<Jane> "Before you were born," unfortunately, doesn't narrow things down much for Jane. Again, she resists probing further. "Well, let's see if we can't make the best of a messy situation, anyway."

<Jane> Occasionally. So far she's gotten a lot more work done through divinations.

<Pascale> OK, so not frequently enough that I need to make obvious things Aspect-2 senses would pick up.

<Jane> well, she DOES have Aspect 2 senses

<Pascale> Well, yes, but a miracle is a little like a charm activation.


<Jane> Aspect 2 isn't miraculous


<Jane> it's just ridiculously super-good senses, as good as sense could be

<Jane> without being miraculously good

<Nico> "…You put him in a bottle. To see if you could."

<Hollyhock God> SORRY, DID I STUTTER, BOY?

  • Nico can't quite grab hold of the ghostit had no real substance, all things consideredbut he let his hands hover around Toltecatl's temples.

<Nico> Pissed.

<Jane> why? :o

<Nico> "Maybe I should put you in a bottle. Just to see if I can. Give it a nice, good shake. You can't come out any crazier than you go in."

<Jane> (I'm pretty sure I could swing that with an Animation!)

<Nico> (Terse thought for Nico:P)

<Pascale> Rand, can you clarify that? I think Aspect use is intrinsically (big-M) Miraculous (even though Aspect-2 doesn't innately trump all mundane actions)

<Hollyhock God> It's miraculous, yeah, although I'm not sure in which cases it matters.



<Jane> "Come on, Pascale, we've kept our guest waiting long enough."

<Pascale> Pascale nods, "Sure. You think you can get him out with your estate?"

<Nico> Nico opens his mouth, breathes deep, expecting anger to just kind of coalesce into a response like vapor into rain, but nothing comes. He's quiet for a long moment. "I don't need you."

<Jane> "Get him out?"

<Nico> "I need someone. I need something. I need help and guidance and knowledge and wisdom and experience. I need SO. MUCH. STUFF. But it doesn't have to be from you."

<Pascale> "Bits of him are probably stuck in the bott.e"

<Jane> "Oh!"

<Pascale> Pascale follows Jane back in, breathing a minor sigh of relief.

<Jane> Jane offers Osgarth a smile as she picks up the coke can, upends it, and gives it a Miraculous shake to dislodge any remaining Halloween-related anything within.

<Hollyhock God> The ghost shrugs. WE'LL SEE HOW THAT GOES.

  • Nico waves a hand, dispersing Toltecatl's ghostly form before rejoining Jane and Pascale, visibly enraged.

<Jane> Jane also picks up and pockets the cork, having a use in mind for it, especially once she sees the look on Nico's face upon returning.

<Hollyhock God> No bits emerge.

<Jane> not even with an Animation?

<Jane> Jane raises the coke can and peers in with the Sight. Also, shit, Aspect 4 miracle vision.

<Hollyhock God> It seems empty.

<Pascale> (…)

<Jane> "Seems empty," she whispers to Pascale.

<Jane> (wut)

<Pascale> Pascale shrugs "Close enough."

<Jane> "Well! Osgarth. Okay, so."

<Hollyhock God> Well, it is!

<Hollyhock God> I never said that was anything in there!

<Jane> "I have some unfortunate news. But also a proposal."

<Pascale> (Sequence went like: 'Wait, he's not IN the can at this point, is he? Oops. Well, OK, I can salvage that remark. Won't make a difference. Just allude to something still being in there and we can run with it….")

<Jane> "The unfortunate news is that from all reports, Atlantis is now a lost and sunken empire, so I'm not sure there's anything there for you to find and rule over right now."

<Hollyhock God> "Atlantis? But—-my sons! My beautiful wife!"

<Hollyhock God> "All these lost for a sack of virgins? A sack which I note I did not actually receive! Oh, cruel fate!"

  • Jane casts her eyes down. "The one responsible for this will be made to answer for his deeds. But!"

<Jane> "Here in Locus Caviel, there exists what I believe to be the world's largest population of werewolves, and at present they run wild and aimless for lack of a king."

<Pascale> Pascale watches carefully, her mouth doing a little twitch thing when Jane decides not to tell him his memories are a pack of lies.

<Jane> (Hey, aside from the disagreements of the rest of history and common sense, we've uncovered no solid evidence that they're a pack of lies.)

<Hollyhock God> "A kingdom without a king? Perhaps fate gives with one hand what it takes with another!"

<Jane> "Indeed. And furthermore, the realm is under siege by the pitiless enemies of Creation. It could use strong arms and sharp claws to defend it!"

<Hollyhock God> "Indeed, indeed. Clearly you are wise beyond your years… and, I see by your regal bearing, a queen in your own right!"

<Jane> Jane raises her hands and conjures forth a robe and crown fitting for the King of Wolfensteins, then offers them quite solemnly to what is, at the end of the day, the biggest and most civilized werewolf she's yet encountered.

<Jane> (They may be a bit baroquely Halloweenish.)

<Hollyhock God> "Thank you, my lady. I accept your proposal of marriage."

<Hollyhock God> "Your people shall be my people, and your enemies shall be my feast!"


<Jane> "I, uh—-"

<Hollyhock God> You are embraced with manly wolfen strength!

<Hollyhock God> Unless you take action to avoid it, I guess.

<Jane> "help"

<Jane> lmao

<Nico> "Need a caterer?"

<Nico> "Because I do cakes."

<Pascale> Pascale looks to Jane and shrugs. "What'd you think I gave you the mace for?"

  • You are now known as RandBrittain

<Jane> oh you son of a bitch you don't call it there lmao

  • RandBrittain treacherously ends the story here!

<Pascale> Kinda early.

<RandBrittain> Drama demanded it!

<RandBrittain> I am but her pawn!

<Nico> It is very early. But also, Doctor Who.

  • Jane lays out a tiger trap for the absentee Vance

<RandBrittain> Next week: A Wedding in Halloweentown

<RandBrittain> Special Guest Star: Lord Entropy and the Entropettes.

<Jane> I'll kill you

<Jane> f3r3iefdshfskjhsdg

<RandBrittain> Ha! You can't!

<RandBrittain> That is the purpose of the Affliction!

<RandBrittain> I mean

  • Jane is now known as Holden

<RandBrittain> We don't have to have a werewolf wedding and haunted honeymoon if you really object.

<RandBrittain> But

<RandBrittain> you walked

<RandBrittain> right

<RandBrittain> into it

<Pascale> …. but who's getting married?

<RandBrittain> What, you want to steal Jane's man for yourself?

<RandBrittain> yessssssss girl fight

<RandBrittain> That reminds me that I need to name a session "Haunted Honeymoon."

<RandBrittain> I love that movie even though it is terrible.

<Pascale> Well, with a title like that someone has to get married. But right now, there's just a crazed werewolf with delusions of grandeur presuming to propose to someone way way out of his league.

<RandBrittain> Maybe you could coax him into a less hairy form?

<Elliott> Let's forcibly marry him to Toltecatl.

<RandBrittain> I'm assured that all wolfensteins are mad sexy underneath it all.

<Holden> Man I wouldn't wish that on anyone but my worst enemy

<RandBrittain> He's done nothing to deserve that1

<Elliott> …True.

<Elliott> Let's try and get him to marry Rebecca Yaga.

<Elliott> She's the youngest of the Yagas. Not even a proper wart on her.

<RandBrittain> Maybe Jane can tweak him a bit with her Domain.

<RandBrittain> She can probably give him a less hairy human shape that way!

<Pascale> But why'd she want to? I mean, if she felt constrained to marry him, sure, but….

<RandBrittain> Or give him a less silly name!

<Elliott> We need to find

<Elliott> An Appellomancer

<Holden> Nobilis has a distinct tendency to easily tip over into Oglaf and/or Homestuck, I notice.

<Pascale> Hm. Will you be taking the Wolfenstein last-name, or hyphenating?

<RandBrittain> Jane Wolf-Booth-enstein.

<Holden> anyway yeah that is going to be sorted out off-camera by next week, possibly via Domain miracles if necessary lol

<Elliott> We could always kill him

<Elliott> Or put him back in the bottle.

<Holden> okay so this surely helps with our chancel security project somehow

<Holden> Toltecatl has a date with that can

<RandBrittain> Only if you marry him!

<RandBrittain> That would be a victory!

  • RandBrittain rolls in yogurt laughing

<Holden> pfft totally not necessary

<Elliott> But Victory doesn't help problems

<Elliott> Errr Projects

<Holden> I thought victory helped them a bit?

<Pascale> But falurre helps more.

<RandBrittain> True. I will grant you a failure.

<RandBrittain> And a broken-hearted wolfenstein.

<Holden> I'm sure there are plenty of fine lady-wolves in the chancel!

<Holden> so what does this all translate to in terms of Destiny?

<RandBrittain> Why mah laptop reboot?

<RandBrittain> What did everybody just say?

<Elliott> He returns to Saaaaaaaave the Daaaaaaaaaleks

<Pascale> I also struggled.

<Pascale> As did Nico.

<RandBrittain> Anyway, it's time for me to do my Phyllis Diller voice and sing my "Marry the Wolfenstein" number.

<Pascale> Nico had two, actually.

<Pascale> Nico is doing a struggle-with-Tolecatl thing.

<Pascale> Which is his general project.

<Holden> this is true

<Pascale> And I a) failed to get him to open up, and b) angst/freaked-out over Ancelin's vision thing.

<RandBrittain> Which of your Projects to that relate to?

<Holden> I didn't really struggle that much, although I did Inhabit something for the first time, which is something I will probably not be repeating any time soon.

<RandBrittain> But thou must!

<Holden> wait, do Struggles have to relate to projects? I thought they just gave you personal destiny as a general thing

<RandBrittain> Because "Be the other guy" jokes amuse me.

<RandBrittain> No, struggles don't; I mean the failure one.

<Holden> oh

<RandBrittain> Okay, I missed a bunch of stuff, so everybody name your Destiny claims from the top down.

<Holden> fortify the chancel

<Pascale> …. hell if I know.

<Elliott> Uhmm…

<Holden> we attempted to recruit a bosswolf for Chancel defense, with mixed results

<RandBrittain> Yeah, fortify the Chancel.

<Elliott> Working on Toltecatl, mostly.

<RandBrittain> You did some stuff, so that's the 1-point for that.

<Elliott> And angsting over myself.

<RandBrittain> And you had mixed results on the wolf.

<RandBrittain> I'll call it a failure since you're going to break his heart.

<Pascale> I failed to get Nico to open up, and struggled with the meaning of Ancelin's vision thing.

<Holden> who is "you" in terms of "you did some stuff"

<Holden> what's a failure worth again?

<RandBrittain> 5

<Holden> so 5 points to Fortify the Chancel?

<RandBrittain> 6.

<Holden> 6?


<RandBrittain> Plus an elephant point.

<RandBrittain> For naming all that other stuff like murderholes.

<RandBrittain> And yagas.

<RandBrittain> And spook butlers.

<Holden> GROUP PROJECT: Fortify the Chancel.

<Holden> (Fortify the Chancel: 6 destiny (recruit broken-hearted werewolf king) +1 (elaboration on defenses))

<RandBrittain> 5 for the king plus 1 for the elaboration is 6 total, yeah.

<Holden> OK

<RandBrittain> I stamp it with my Hollyhock seal!

<Holden> I don't think I got any Personal Destiny (again)

<RandBrittain> Your plot is simmering! Soon it will explode!

<Elliott> Getting married is totally worth Personal Destiny.

<Elliott> So there's that to look forward to.

<Holden> although there was that brief moment of groping about to determine whether or not I might in fact have bottled a werewolf and not remembered it

<Holden> but that was really really really minor, more just roleplaying than struggle

<Pascale> Though that's kind of what struggle's about.

<Pascale> Roleplaying, I mean.

<Holden> trigger warning: #forced marriage #excessive body hair

<RandBrittain> Yeah, you get 10 points of Change destiny for a wolfenstein wedding.

<Holden> pass!

<RandBrittain> But… 10 points!

<Elliott> C'mon, Jane. It's just a wedding.

<Elliott> Don't you want a new Anchor?

<Elliott> And 10 shiny Destiny?

<Holden> if jane gets married, it will be in flagrant violation of the windflower law or not at all

<RandBrittain> He'd be a good camouflage!

<RandBrittain> Nobody would notice your real boyfriend over all his speeches.

<Holden> so I guess Vance is at the bottom of the sea now

<Pascale> …. yeah, didn't we talk about getting a Windflower plot?

<RandBrittain> Let's see, Nico made a good try at a Struggle.

<Melum> Just arrange to Exalt your lover.

<RandBrittain> There's probably some Destiny in there somewhere; let me check in there somewhere.

<Melum> I mean enNoble.

<Elliott> Aya.

<Melum> Oh, windflower law.

<Pascale> Sure you did, Melum.

<RandBrittain> Pascale is struggling with her Familia's respect a bit, I guess.

<Melum> I thought you meant…whatever the "Call no beast your master" law was.

<RandBrittain> Not quite up to the right level, but working up to it!

<RandBrittain> Crowfoot.

<RandBrittain> Next week: apparently not a wolfenstein wedding. :(

<Pascale> … I'll take it. But more it was with the nature of secrets. I had a thing! Qualia, Ancerry, get Nico to open up….

<RandBrittain> I will have to find Jane a better boyfriend.

<RandBrittain> Maybe a helsingman.

<Melum> A renfield?

<Elliott> What Jane really needs is a Dalek

<Pascale> You and the Daleks!

<Elliott> :p

<Melum> I'm American, so your Whoisms are confusing and infuriating.

<RandBrittain> Some handsome monster-hunter in leather to sweep her off her feet!

<Elliott> …i'm american.

<RandBrittain> And then drive a stake through her heart.

<RandBrittain> Your love is double forbidden!


<Melum> Drawn by Yoshitaka Amano?

<RandBrittain> That is the best kind of love!

<Melum> With a giant hat.

<RandBrittain> if necessary

<Elliott> …Now I'm imagining Jane as Marcelline

<Pascale> Well, clearly, Jane's problem was inheriting Elvira's job, but not her wardrobe.

<Holden> This is true

<Melum> I imagine Jane as more of a Lydia Deetz affair.

<Holden> I keep meaning to have her upgrade from her mortal Old Navy stylings to something a little more Maleficent and keep not having a chance to since the games are so busy

<Elliott> So, did I get Struggle?

<Pascale> Eh.

<Pascale> Jane has orange in her hair, and is a badass biker chick.

<Elliott> Estate Properties of Jane:

<Elliott> Jane doesn't take your shit [2]

<Elliott> Unless your shit can get Jane destiny [1]

<Elliott> Even then, maybe not. [1]

<Pascale> She's…. KINDA goth, I guess, but seems more, you know, awesome than pale spooky girl in the corner.

<Melum> Toynbee idea: Power of Footnotes.

<RandBrittain> Oh, Jaaaaane, why are you so mean?

<Melum> Okay, you can be a Misfit.

<RandBrittain> She's not mean, she's ???? years old, and she just lost track of her mo-ral code

<Holden> o_O

<Elliott> Moiral code.

<RandBrittain> I will look up Nico's Struggle possibilities after work.

<RandBrittain> Yes, Jane should be somebody's moirail.

<Holden> Moirail code

<Holden> oh god

<Holden> speaking of, is homestuck down for anyone else?

<RandBrittain> Up for me.

<Pascale> You talked about windflower shipping Pascale earlier, too.

<RandBrittain> I was going to pair you with Paolo but ran out of time.

<Elliott> Hmm. Does Nico's thing with the ghost himself count as anything?

<Elliott> So much Windlower Shipping

<Pascale> We run out of time because we only play 2.5 hours/week.

<Elliott> We should make a wall

  • Melum falls in love with an actual windflower.

<Elliott> Vance figured out pStates for the Trolls

<Elliott> I think I might have to use them.

<Melum> The hell is a pState?

<Pascale> Pseudoestate.

<Pascale> Come on, the book's been out for hours!

<Melum> I never pass up a chance to say "pseudo-"

<RandBrittain> I hired Miranda to make a Chuubo shipping wall. :)


<Elliott> Qui est Miranda?

<Pascale> Harrel. Did the Excrucian webcomic. But it's futile because the ChuuboPCs are presented with genderflop variants.

<Pascale> Did we ultimately figure out how many Destiny we get?

<RandBrittain> Yes, except for Nico, which I must look up.

<RandBrittain> The wall will be great.

<RandBrittain> I have seeded it with pairings both canon and crack.

<Elliott> Question: Who is the skankiest Chuubo's character?

<Pascale> … Shonen.

<RandBrittain> Yeah, prolly.

<RandBrittain> I mean, it's questionable.

<Pascale> (I'm not seeing it, I thought I made two destiny claims?)

<RandBrittain> Sex is all sweaty and effort-y.

<RandBrittain> He hates that kind of work!

<Melum> I demand photos.

<Melum> Even if the Magical Girl Detective is too young to date.

<Pascale> He has interest in the opposite sex/romance or /perversion as alternate vices.


<Holden> o_O

<RandBrittain> Meanwhile, I think the main way that quests improve on Destiny is that you can earn XP one scene at a time.

<Melum> Also, sidequests.

<Pascale> … but I thought I did that.

<RandBrittain> With a struggle one scene in a story doesn't work as well.

<Holden> yeah Pascale did some good… stuff… this week

<Holden> gotta adjust expectations to how often we play!

<RandBrittain> That's true!

<Elliott> Man

<RandBrittain> I will award some Destiny or other somewhere, when I am able to be in a chair.

<Pascale> Oh! You are working this weekend as well.

<Elliott> I really want to see Chuubo's system for handling this all; it seems much more…sensible

<Elliott> Or granular.

<Holden> He toils in the yogurt mines

<RandBrittain> For your treats.


<RandBrittain> It's definitely more granular.

<RandBrittain> It's a definite new iteration of what Destiny does.

<Melum> It's pseudogranular.

<Elliott> pGran

<Holden> yes

<RandBrittain> Thought I think it needs two more iterations before hitting brilliance.

<Pascale> Honestly, I continue to dislike Destiny.

<Elliott> It continues to vex me entirely!

<Holden> I'll be honest, I find it kinda wonky and unsatisfying too

<Holden> I think it's something that was really not designed with the kind of game we're playing in mind

<Elliott> I am not used to having XP that…I don't know. Feels continigent on upstaging the other players.

<Holden> yeah

<Elliott> I think Destiny would be a brilliant system, if it weren't tied to advancement.

<Holden> yeah

<Holden> I mean

<Pascale> The way I mentally bracket it is this:

<RandBrittain> I feel like it's problematic in that it runs on a different time scale than the story.

<Holden> the Project advancement stuff, that makes sense I think

<Holden> the chancel upgrade project, you know, that I'm okay with

<Holden> it's the Destiny-as-XP where it feels like it really falls flat

<Elliott> Yeah.

  • RandBrittain notes this comment.

<Holden> yeah

<Pascale> I kind of accept that by treating Nobilis 3e as a 0-progression game.

<Elliott> There's an element of conditioning involved.

<RandBrittain> Maybe I could give you guys the Quest system?

<Holden> we do short sessions that tend to be story-focused, with character bits happening incidentally at the periphery

<Pascale> Like, you can already end the world if nobody important stops you.

<RandBrittain> And let you use it instead of Destiny?

<Pascale> Quests wouldn't be right for Nobilis.

<RandBrittain> The main thing is, like tonight?

<RandBrittain> Pascale didn't really properly earn Struggle Destiny.

<RandBrittain> Even though she did some good stuff!

<Elliott> How did she not?

<RandBrittain> Because Destiny is parcelled out on a wider scale than we tend to do character notes on.

<Holden> I dunno, she seemed to be struggling with the metafuckery of being Secrets.

<Elliott> Yeah.

<Pascale> I wanted to do character notes!

<Holden> Isn't that the whole point of Struggle?

<RandBrittain> So when you get one character note per session, you don't get proper credit for it even if you do it every session.

<RandBrittain> Because I'm passing out the points based on what you get done in a given session and not overall.

<Holden> honestly

<Pascale> But I was pulled away to go talk about a Werewolf.

<RandBrittain> Whereas Quests give you credit for the overall.

<Holden> I'd kinda be happiest, I think, with the way we're playing

<Holden> on an entirely HG-driven advancement schema

<Pascale> ….

<Pascale> Hm,

<Pascale> I know if I was running, I'd be tempted to toss out .25xp/session or something like that.

<Holden> "well you've been exploring your Estate pretty rigorously for seven or eight sessions now, you get this"

<Pascale> But yeah.

<Holden> The funky thing is that like

<Holden> It feels like Projects are almost superfluous?

<Elliott> I honestly feel, like, greedy or wrong-spirited doing Advancement in Projects.

<Holden> It's like they exist to give the player permission to audaciously change the world

<Elliott> Like it's not what they're meant for, but then they keep trying to be it?

<Holden> and reach out and grasp the kind of things a White Wolf game would level "plot devices" or "storyteller fiat"

<Pascale> Of course, that's one of the reason the HG has vast discretionary authority and the biggest awesome thing is at like 75 Destiny.

<Holden> like, "Sam Haight invents a rite to skin werewolves and become a Garou"

<Pascale> But no actual *floor*

<RandBrittain> Yeah,t they feel good at that.

<RandBrittain> It's the advancement that feels weird, I agree.

<Holden> which is totally ridiculously illegal and broken and impossible until the game company writes an NPC that did it, because magic and striving and plot

<Pascale> You know what would be a great thread on

<RandBrittain> In Chuubo finishing a quest tends to give you a plot progression thing with a character advancement bennie almost as an afterthought.

<Holden> Nobilis says "you can just write down that you're going to reform a fallen angel into a nice person" and you feel like, okay, we can do that

<Holden> but I think the "XP progress bar" leading you there after that is almost totally superfluous

<Pascale> I think it works if what you're trying to do is specific.

<Pascale> Like: 'Become Immortal'

<Holden> since it's nonintuitive to fill it in, and of totally arbitrary length

<RandBrittain> Or, like, if Nico didn't have a ghost anchor, and wanted to bind Toltecatl.

<Holden> Pascale: Yeah exactly

<Holden> Become Immortal is a good one

<RandBrittain> As an accomplishing things thing, I think it works really well.

<RandBrittain> But for really generic but desirable advancement like "more aspect" it's bad.

<Holden> yeah

<Pascale> And while, in theory, I am fine with 0-advancement gaming, *getting cool new toys is fun*

<Holden> agree

<RandBrittain> I think I could construct a good quest for it, really.

<Pascale> (Oh! OK! Maybe I did earn struggle, if phrased as 'struggle with being secrets'?)

<Holden> also if I knew I was signing up for 0 advancement, now that I've got a better feel for what the stats do, I'd probably have spread the CP around a bit differently

<RandBrittain> A quest is basically just me telling you how much Destiny you need in advance, plus you get Destiny every time you spend a scene on the matter.

<Holden> (mostly in that putting 4 and 5 point Persona effects in an affordable range turns out to be much more useful than my Aspect)

<Pascale> Ach

<Pascale> I still want to see someone cut loose with Aspect.

<Elliott> Yeah, we're not big on Aspect

<Pascale> On account of "It's What Solars Do."

<Holden> I would very much like to eventually do an Aspect-binge character

<Pascale> Do you think you'd like to respec, Holden?

<Holden> At present, no.

<Pascale> I think part of the way my character relates to yours is based on her Aspectyness.

<Holden> I dig Jane as a character and so far I've been able to kludge along fine— would rather RP my way to strengthening the Halloween bond and getting more Persona. Also more Aspect, frankly.

<Holden> For better or worse, I think Jane's developing a self-image as the team's heavy-hitting badass.

<Pascale> Technically, Melum is better at it, but he's had some conflicts in availability.

<Holden> Which is probably going to take a bruising the first time she goes up against a real Aspect monster.

<Pascale> But you took, I think, Durant, and Aspect, and the character detail "tough biker," so you get looked up to as the heavy-hitter.

<Elliott> Domain is very offensive

<Pascale> Where Nico really has utility.

<Holden> To be honest, thinking back, Aspect is more central to the character than Persona.

<Holden> It's just that since I started playing, I've come to realize how ridiculously hax Persona is.

<Pascale> And Pascale is, theoretically, info and trump.

<Holden> Pascale: Elusive, not Durant. But yeah.

<Pascale> Oh.

<Pascale> Elusive is such a waste.

<Holden> Is it?

<Holden> Rand recommended it!

<RandBrittain> People try to turn you into a cat or something all the time!

<RandBrittain> It's a serious problem!

<Pascale> Sure, but it loses to those.

<Pascale> Because it's miracle-level 3 and anything that turns you into a car is at least 4.

<Holden> maybe I should swap it out for Durant? Shit, let me look these things up again.

<RandBrittain> It's still a reduction.

<RandBrittain> And it has special effects!

<RandBrittain> You need a level 6 miracle to hit someone Elusive with a Deadly.

<RandBrittain> Without Elusive you need a 4.

<Pascale> Depending on the miracle.

<RandBrittain> If it's the relevant sort, yeah

<Holden> It didn't seem to help me much against Ancelin Anderly

<Pascale> Well, Ancelin we had at least three different countermeasures for.

<RandBrittain> Which you eventually used.

<Pascale> Wounds?

<Pascale> Preservation of secrers.

<RandBrittain> Yeah, those two.

<Pascale> Bonds, etc.

<Holden> then again, I'm still really unclear on what he even hit us with

<RandBrittain> Sometimes just going along with it for a while is more fun, since you can claim the Wound retroactively.

<Pascale> Which is fair.

<RandBrittain> A mysterious pState effect!

<Holden> If I remember right, the only Wound I took was from Nico hulking out and knocking me through a wall

<RandBrittain> Yeah, you can delay taking a wound.

<RandBrittain> Like, you can just be enchanted for now and declare the Wound later when going along with it is less appropriate or fun.

<Pascale> Right. It was narratively appropriate, but a bad systems demo.

<Pascale> (Hey, didn't he promise blood this time?)

<RandBrittain> Some virgins were eaten!

<RandBrittain> At least implicitly!

<Pascale> :)

<Holden> but yeah

<Holden> to get back to the central thing:

<Holden> I want more Aspect and have no idea how to get it; and the approved methods for getting Personal Destiny don't seem to really make sense

<Elliott> Get married and pregnant!

<RandBrittain> I provided you with a great opportunity for Change!

<Elliott> That would give you enough Personal Destiny to become more godly in physique!

<Holden> like, I can sit there trying to bench-press the horizon to lower the sun and moon for years, and I'm not going to make one iota of progress until I have an existential crisis about it?

<RandBrittain> Well, it's a narrative mechanic.

<Holden> :?

<RandBrittain> Characters don't actually sit there bench-pressing the horizon and only succeeding when they have a crisis.

<Holden> I think the big problem tho is the same one Elliott has

<Holden> I feel like I already dominate the sessions too much as it is lol

<Pascale> You won't make progress until you tell a story about how you overcome obstacles to improve your physical power.

<Elliott> Yes

<RandBrittain> I will consider an alternate advancement scheme.

<Pascale> … am I not dominating them enough?

<Elliott> We should all get XP that can be spent on Celestial Martial Arts.

<Pascale> Our boss is infernal!

<RandBrittain> Nico already knows Infernal Monster Style.

<Pascale> But, I mean, if Eliott and Holden both feel they're overdominating….

<RandBrittain> Pascale won last week for the team!

<Pascale> … by doing nothing and providing pie at the end?

<Elliott> Sometimes, when I'm running combats in Exalted, I flirt shamelessly with the terrible idea of filing the names off Nobilis and using that instead.

<RandBrittain> Pie that was not vegetable-imbued!

<Melum> Just use them for 3e

<Melum> No one will know

<Pascale> Hm.

<RandBrittain> So how did people find this story on the whole?

<Elliott> Kind of…out there.

<RandBrittain> It seems Holden does not want to marry the werewolf, although I admit I was mostly carried away by the potential for the rotfls.

<Pascale> It was also short.

<RandBrittain> Next week we can just play from midnight to five AM.

<Pascale> I mean, an episode of a TV show with a werewolf that wants to marry the lead…

<Pascale> Would work

<Pascale> The thing is, we don't actually save on time, because we stick around for an hour plus after anyhow.

<Holden> Pascale is great

<Pascale> :)

<Holden> Also ADam isright

<RandBrittain> I just have sort of hampered concentration.

<Holden> is right*

<Holden> this story felt kinda like filler week, but was fun

<RandBrittain> Maybe a noon game, or a midnight one?

<Holden> short tho

<Pascale> Who's off for Labor Day?

<RandBrittain> I am.

<RandBrittain> Maybe some big plot soon?

<RandBrittain> I am unsure how fast or slow to time big revelations.

<Elliott> Big revelation: we're all Deceivers.

<Pascale> I think my preference would be…. not so much big revelations as more Serious Plot?

<Elliott> Deep cover.

<Pascale> Not Epic Plot mind.

<RandBrittain> If Vance would show up I could advance his palemates plot.

<Pascale> But, like, stuff that isn't pie-fights or having pity on random crazy werewolves. Not that there isn't fun there!

<RandBrittain> A journey to the rivers of milk and ambrosia.

<Holden> I'll be totally honest, I have the most fun when this is basically god-powered adventures/supers gaming

<Holden> I am aware this is horribly squandering the material

<Pascale> It isn't.

<Pascale> That's kind of the point of N3e

<Pascale> I mean, you can do philosophical dickering and brain-bendy fun.

<RandBrittain> Fine, next week an aerial battle with a dragon over a costume party the size of Manhattan!

<Holden> yeah

<Holden> well put it this way

<Holden> I built the character whose default solution to every problem is "conjure and animate shadows" and/or "summon armies of monsters"

<RandBrittain> 3e is kind of "let's write the game the way people were actually playing it."

<Holden> that probably says a lot about what I want to be doing lol

<Elliott> :p

<Holden> however, I have very little exposure to the game and am still learning about all the things it can do!

<Holden> so

<Pascale> No, that makes sense.

<Pascale> It's definitley a signalling thing.

<RandBrittain> yesssss giant dragon fight

<RandBrittain> those are always best

<Elliott> Followed by romantic subplots for everyone.

<Pascale> Sure. Something that needs to be stopped for a reason, and we stop it?

<Pascale> That's pretty cool.

<Pascale> Things I want to do:

<Holden> signalling thing?

<RandBrittain> Your build signals the HG as to what you're interested in.

<Holden> probably the only shaky bit of Nobilis that I can see is that if you run it as a straightforward stop-the-baddies game, it's like

<Holden> if someone gets sufficiently clever— or just binge-spends— they can shut down your story in one action very easily

<RandBrittain> Bam! baddies stopped.

<Holden> or maybe not, I still haven't really seen the wounds system put through its paces.

<RandBrittain> Yeah, the way I have seen it told is:

<RandBrittain> In Nobilis, you have a problem.

<RandBrittain> So you try to solve it!

<RandBrittain> Immediately you find a way.

<Holden> thus the emphasis on existential problems

<RandBrittain> But that way is tacky

<RandBrittain> Or morally offensive

<Pascale> Well. I should specify that Pascale's been doing a bunch of things in secret.

<RandBrittain> Or would make an enemy you wouldn't enjoy having.

<Holden> although honestly, standing there in the middle of Santa's workshop trading quips while our miracles beat the shit out of a bunch of rabid elves and we think up a proper miracle to advance to the next scene is a lot of fun

<RandBrittain> So you spend the session finding a way that is more suitable, or that makes an enemy that's fun.

<Pascale> Specifically because Ancerry's estate is *problematic*.

<Pascale> Since he's functionally omniscient, she's trying to do pull off a magic trick, something that works even if the other person observes it— because: secret.

<RandBrittain> Arguably you could foil him by invoking his presence.

<RandBrittain> Or find something that he does not wish to see to veil his absence in.

<Pascale> No; he could remove the quality of his presence from even his presence.

<Pascale> But even if that might work, it's not exactly her heroic niche.

<Elliott> So

<Elliott> I eventually want to do an Imperial Miracle.

<RandBrittain> yessssss

<Elliott> Because despite all the many explanations, I still have no idea how to actually manage one.

<Holden> me either

<Pascale> Well, filling up a bubble on your Project Map counts as one!

<Holden> them being in Treasure mystifies me utterly

<Elliott> Same!

<Holden> if Jenna does a Nobilis 3 revised, I would beg her to redo or re-explain Treasure

<Holden> the whole thing is conceptually baffling

<Pascale> Treasure is OK.

<RandBrittain> I would not mind seeing a kickstarter for a revised book with nicer art.

<Holden> also I still can't tell the difference between a "wondrous" item and a miraculous item

<Holden> and a mundane one

<Pascale> Wonderous is a magic sword

<RandBrittain> One is magic and one is miraculous.

<Holden> it's like she invented a third category that exists nowhere else in the game

<Holden> but magic is mundane, isn't it?

<Holden> a magic flaming sword is just a mundane sword, which is mundanely on fire?

<RandBrittain> The flaming sword is a really really terrible example

<Holden> and this is only noteworthy because that is not a thing mundane swords and flames normally do

<Pascale> or mundanely shoots lasers or mundanely turns you into toads.

<Melum> Magic is not a thing. Or rather it is a thing, but a rather mundane thing.

<Holden> right, so……..

<RandBrittain> Like, a good wondrous anchor is more like a decanter of endless water.

<Melum> Miracles are where it's at.

<Elliott> So it's two categories.

<RandBrittain> When you activate it, you get endless water.

<Holden> treasure is basically built in three 'effect band' clusters

<Holden> mundane crap, wondrous crap, and then Miraculous crap

<Melum> It's like thaumaturgy.

<Holden> but it appears to be Boring Mundane Crap, Weird Mundane Crap, and then Actual Miracles

<Melum> It's cute and sometimes useful but has shit all to do with Sorcery.

<RandBrittain> Normally using magic for endless water is going to have a huge Obstacle, but treasure obviates that.

<Holden> except the mid-range can turn mundane crap into miraculous crap?

<RandBrittain> For a mundane Anchor, a better example is Jeeves.

<Pascale> The thing is, all Treasure miracles are fueled my Miraculous force.

<RandBrittain> Jeeves can do all kinds of hella useful stuff.

<Pascale> Rose Tyler is a Mundane Anchor.

<Pascale> A Screwdriver is a Wonderous Anchor.

<Pascale> Sonic, rather

<Pascale> Sonic Screwdriver.

<Pascale> The TARDIS is a miraculous anchor.

<Pascale> You can win the day with any of them. But the more miraculous ones have a broader scope of things they let you do.

<Elliott> Except the rules let you push the first two up, but you can't downscale Miraculous.

<RandBrittain> Or, say, Sailor Moon's cat is a mundane Anchor, her Moon Prism Pendant is a wondrous Anchor, and the Phantom Silver Crystal is a miraculous Anchor.

<Melum> Chibi-Usa is her Bane.

<Pascale> I mean, the Doctor is one of the major examples of a Treasure based hero

<Pascale> King Arthur would also be a good example.

<Pascale> Treasure is why Nobilis-Arthur, using 'Excalibur' or 'My knights of the round table' is as good at killing dragons as Nobilis-Hercules.

<RandBrittain> Treasure isn't just about having stuff, it's about being able to wield your power *through* stuff.

<Elliott> King Arthur is a terrible example.

<Elliott> Because Arthur does diddly shit.

<Elliott> Arthur is Merlin's Anchor.

<Elliott> :p

<RandBrittain> It's about being able to wield your effectiveness through your servants and tools and organizations.

<RandBrittain> Yeah, with Treasure it can be your will that moves in your court and your knights.

<RandBrittain> You don't have to personally go places.

<RandBrittain> You can be effective by proxy.

<Pascale> Exactly. Merlin has Domain or Persona or gifts or magical skill: Magic.

<Elliott> Alchemicals would be fun in Nobilis. Get to uninstall and mix Gifts between sessions at the Vats.

<Pascale> Hm. Yeah. I guess that'd work.

<Melum> It's more of a Treasure.

<Melum> My Vat Installs Super Powers

<Elliott> Meh.

<Elliott> That doesn't really open avenues for advancement.

<Elliott> Which I needed in my Nobxalted hack

<Pascale> That's a more Nobilis-internal model, rather than how you'd want to capture the *feel* of Alchemicals in Ex-bilis.

<Melum> Sure it does. Better charm arrays are higher level Miracles.

<Elliott> But it doesn't allow for the collection of a Panoply on retainer

<Pascale> Hm. Wouldn't mind my predecessor's unimaginably complicated scheme starting to show itself…

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