Seventeenth Story - We Ship Praxael ♠ Everybody

<RandBrittain> One, a-two-hoo, three.

<ADamiani> Of all the names for Hurricanes, why'd they have to pick the one from the Addams Family movie?

<RandBrittain> Gomez?

  • RandBrittain always thinks of the princess from the Xanth books.

<ADamiani> No, Hurricane Irene.

<ADamiani> It's the book Fester opens in the climax.

<KreenWarrior> Huh.

<KreenWarrior> This hurricane is pretty unimpressive.

<KreenWarrior> Lots of rain but not much wind.

<KreenWarrior> Here in DC only, obviously.

<Benhimself> Mmm. Nothing bad up here in CT yet, but of course they're not even expecting signs of it to start until midnight or so at earliest, and 2 PM tomorrow at worst.

  • Benhimself will still probably call out from work tonight just to avoid getting stuck when everyone from Day Shift calls out.

<RandBrittain> But they need you!

<RandBrittain> You are the best there is!

<Benhimself> Well, then, they shouldn't have dangled the threat of "mandatory overtime" over our heads so often last winter.

<Benhimself> To be fair they never actually did it, but still, they wanted to make sure we knew they reserved the right to do so "if they had to". So, fuck them.

<RandBrittain> Save the calling out for when we start the Chuubo playtesting.

<RandBrittain> Whenever that may be.

<RandBrittain> Do you think the others will appear?

<ADamiani> … are we not allowed to do that?

<ADamiani> Chuubo's playtesting?

<KreenWarrior> That's an important question!

<RandBrittain> Once the writing is done, playtesting will surely begin!

<ADamiani> I mean, bits of it are done…

<RandBrittain> You're the only one who has those bits.

<RandBrittain> But once there are more bits, there will be playtesting and anyway I'll get everything to make the EPUB out of.

<ADamiani> Open on my desktop as we speak, yes.

  • Benhimself would definitely be down for playtesting it when such a thing happens.

<ADamiani> I'm not entirely sure it will make a good IRC game; there are many tokens flying around. Will kill at cons, though.

<KreenWarrior> Very interesting.

<RandBrittain> We can PbP if we gotta. I didn't get much active playtesting done last time; this time I want to contribute more.

<RandBrittain> Apparently it's going to be Star Driver: the RPG or some such.

<ADamiani> What?

<KreenWarrior> I actually have a group now that I could test with. They're pretty much D&D-philes but we could be like a control group or something

<KreenWarrior> In-person group, I mean.

<ADamiani> Star what?

<RandBrittain> Star Driver, the anime. By the people who did Utena.

<ADamiani> Never heard of it.

<RandBrittain> It's very… it's… it has qualities, such as distinct entities do.

  • RandBrittain is having difficulty describing it.

<ADamiani> What makes you say Star Driver RPG?

<RandBrittain> Well, mostly because that was what Jenna told me it would be like.

<RandBrittain> As far as tone goes.

<RandBrittain> There's some heroic school friends, and an Evil Secret Student Council, and FABULOUS outfits, and mecha, and secret battles of which ordinary people wot not…

<RandBrittain> And women recross their legs before saying things.

<ADamiani> And rats.

<ADamiani> And roofs.

<RandBrittain> I think that's part of a sub-setting.

<RandBrittain> I suggested boarding school as a separate sub-setting.

<ADamiani> And an economy based in part on Kaiju harvesting.

<Benhimself> Excellent.

<RandBrittain> I wonder how separate "boarding school" stories are from standard school stories.

<ADamiani> Depends on the [REDACTED].

<ADamiani> Now, er… can we move on because I am so a loose-lips person and I don't want to sink ships.

  • RandBrittain grumbles at the art mules getting all these secrets before the ebook mules.

<RandBrittain> Though I don't even want to think about ebooks now; I've been replacing all the English-style quotes in my books with American-style double quotes.

<ADamiani> 'Whysoever would you do that,' he asked?

<ADamiani> Grr. No, I've gotten a Nook now so I very much appreciate your efforts.

<Benhimself> I don't know. I'm kind of intrigued at the idea of fishing for spoilers!

<RandBrittain> You should fish for spoilers in-character!

<RandBrittain> Then you can make it a matter for struggle-Destiny!

  • You are now known as Hollyhock God

<Hollyhock God> So, last week Miranda raised her Imperator from the grave using a mail-order book of spells.

<Hollyhock God> More or less.

<Cyrus> Huh.

<Hollyhock God> I'm sure you can imagine how happy she was, and Praxael threw you a big party with lots of cake.

<Miranda> Well. It checked out with the original. And also with the book I stole from Death. After beating the crap out of her.

<Hollyhock God> Or substitute some noun you like better for 'cake' if you prefer.

  • Dreams has misgivings/suspicions about all that, but is keeping silent on the matter.

<Miranda> I may have skydived off the side of the Ash in joy.

<Hollyhock God> Possibly Miranda will be shuffling her Bonds and Afflictions to remove her immunity to happiness?

<Hollyhock God> Let us simply consider the Bond broken for the nonce.

<Miranda> Possibly.

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, that was three days ago. You're all at home on a rainy day in Locus Praxael.

<Miranda> Technically wasn't immune to happiness, just happened to be wracked with guilt and sorrow. I could be happy too.

<Hollyhock God> Name an occasion on which that occurred.

<Miranda> I didn't say I was, just that it was possible.

<Hollyhock God> Oh, sure, theoretically.

<Hollyhock God> Your father-angel has instructed you all to remain in the Chancel while he sorts out the whole business with your death warrant.

<Dreams> Miranda may have learned secrets that Godkind Was Not Meant To Know.

<Dreams> "Miranda may have learned secrets that Godkind Was Not Meant To Know."

<Hollyhock God> Perhaps Ananda will come by with a steel wool scrubbing brush and take it to the inside of Miranda's skull.

<Miranda> "Doesn't matter."

<Hollyhock God> Speaking of, what are you wearing?

<Miranda> Depends where I am.

<Cyrus> (All of us, or just Miranda?)

<Dreams> Full regalia and panoply!

<Hollyhock God> Mostly Miranda, since she was recently in mourning.

<Dreams> Oh, fine then; I won't go into a lavish description.

<Miranda> Hm. I keep vacillating about what city she's from.

<Hollyhock God> But everybody is welcome to tell me!

<Miranda> Which is relevant.

  • Dreams might not even bother with the nimbus of asemic symbolism!

<Hollyhock God> I mean, Cneph knows this is a game where everybody is welcome to go into lavish descriptions of their outfit at any time.

<Hollyhock God> Discussions about fashion are almost never irrelevant.

<Dan> Dan is wearing a meatdress. No, he doesn't know why either. >_>

<Dan> (Not really.)

<Dreams> "Dan, why are you wearing a… never mind."

<Miranda> (I just assumed Seeds said to wear it…)

<Hollyhock God> Ugh, big words. While I was fixing the quote marks I was also trying to correct all the errors in these Michael Innes books I bought.

<Hollyhock God> It's really hard to know if something is a spelling error or not when they keep throwing out words that even the English major has never heard of.

<Cyrus> Cyrus is wearing a t-shirt, jeans, and an improbably large green leprechaun hat.

<Cyrus> (He lost a bet.)

<Miranda> (For some reason New York doesn't seem right, but I'm probably going with it anyhow)

<Dreams> (I could see her as a small-town girl, actually.)

<Miranda> (Not as an adult, she wasn't.)

<Miranda> But it's probably jeans and a Mets shirt.

<Hollyhock God> Who is this strange, unsad person?

<Miranda> Probably the one who's keept half of Venice awake cranking up an old Springsteen album.

<Hollyhock God> And why is there a crescent-shaped hole in her face?

<Dan> Dan's wearing khakis and a polo shirt, except there's a bridge where the polo player is.

  • Dreams feels a little overdressed.

<Miranda> Stupid immortals. Stupid not needing to sleep.

  • Dreams fiddles with the jewelry used for formal indications to indicate Persona, the way crowns indicate Domain.

<Hollyhock God> Yes, it is a happy, happy day. Completely unsuitable for this campaign.

<Hollyhock God> I will fix it.

<Miranda> We had faith.

<Dan> (Wouldn't going without sleep/food/etc end up requring a sustained Aspect miracle?)

<Miranda> (Immortal.)

  • Hollyhock God looks through a Springsteen discography, hoping to find a suitable song for Marley.

<Dan> (Oh right, in the Gift sense, not in the "lacking a finite life span" sense.)

  • Hollyhock God isn't finding one.

<Hollyhock God> Fine, I'll use something else.

<Dan> (BRB, have to put laundry in the dryer.)

<Hollyhock God> Miranda is attacked by clothing from out of the laundry hamper!

<Hollyhock God> Your old mourning suit rises from the grave, filling out with the outlines of an invisible person, complete with a watch from your dresser hovering at one wrist.

<Miranda> (Dead man walking!)

<Hollyhock God> It shakes the nothing where its hand should be at you testily.

<Hollyhock God> "Look what you've done now!" says Marley.

<Hollyhock God> "Also my head still hurts."

<Miranda> "Mourning, Marley!"

  • Miranda even puns cheerily. You think Death can get me down?

<Cyrus> Wow.

<Dreams> "Are we absolutely sure Miranda hasn't been replaced by a Deceiver-shard?"

<Miranda> This is actually a lot more normal for Miranda.

<Cyrus> Cyrus rolls to disbelieve.

<Hollyhock God> "Oh, you sad, sad, moron," says Marley's suit. "This is just so incredibly awkward and sad. You have no idea what you've done. And since I knew that, I've gone to a good deal of trouble to manifest myself here, since you don't seem inclined to leave your Chancel anymore."

  • Miranda beams.

<Miranda> "Well… as I recall, someone tried to kill me when I came to ask her about it over tea. How's that exploding-star burn healing up, anyhow?"

<Hollyhock God> "And did you think at any point that maybe there was a reason for that? That maybe I wouldn't have put myself to the trouble of killing the unkillable to keep it secret just because I didn't like the typography?"

  • Miranda shrugs.

<Hollyhock God> "That's certainly why I destroyed all the copies I knew about, although evidently not well enough… it's really my fault."

<Dreams> "Yes, yes. You made mention of a dire revelation?"

<Miranda> "I'd have stuck around to ask. But honestly, the trying to kill me bit rather killed the conversation."

<Miranda> "…although, honestly, just a tiny miracle from you could have kept that alive, come to think of it."

<Hollyhock God> "It was because of my failure that the spell exists. There was an attack on the Estate of Death and I… made some mistakes. And that book was created, with the power to do the impossible and raise angels from the dead."

<Hollyhock God> "Well, sort of angels."

<Hollyhock God> "More like really good imitations. In short, Mimics."

<Cyrus> (Are we here to hear this? Because Cyrus would definitely be "…"-ing right now.

<Hollyhock God> "Maxiel was only the first, and she's caused no end of trouble, since I had no way to prove she wasn't genuine, since the Eye-of-Heaven had covered up her death.

<Hollyhock God> "I mean, I've found ways of keeping her under wraps, but it wasn't easy."

<Dreams> (I assume so!)

  • Miranda rolls her eyes.

<Cyrus> "…"

<Hollyhock God> "But you just had to do it again. You dangerous, mute lunatic."

<Hollyhock God> I'm sorry, I mean mulish lunatic.

<Miranda> "Oh, gosh. If only I had gone to someone who was an expert on death magic to find out what the spell actually did."

<Hollyhock God> "Oh, you were way crazy by that point; I didn't feel like trusting you not to go through with it anyway! Not when my execution plus the fate of Creation was on the line."

<Miranda> (To be fair, OOC, I'm kinda miffed because I totally saw this coming and everybody was yelling at me to go ahead and pull the pin!)

<Hollyhock God> (You signed up for blasphemous resurrection of your own free will!)

<Miranda> "Well. See what happens when you don't trust?"

<Miranda> (I'm not saying I didn't want it…)

<Hollyhock God> "That goes both wa—oh, never mind. The point is, you've conjured a terrifying enemy of Creation in your daddy's image; what are you going to do about it?"

<Miranda> "Well, demanding proof for one thing. Because, honestly, Marley, I stopped trusting you about the time when I discovered that you lied to me and tried to kill me."

<Dreams> "She does have a point."

<Miranda> "And let me add that was while I had no Imperator, such that the act would have amounted to Excruciation."

<Hollyhock God> "I have none. None whatsoever. But I warned you before and I'm warning you again after and if you won't help me fix this then I warn you I will take steps to fix you permanently."

<Hollyhock God> "Actually that's probably part of the fixing process anyway, as I was hinting at earlier."

<Dan> "So given that the death threat didn't work in the first place, you decided to fall back on more death threats?"

<Hollyhock God> She has lots of death on hand!

<Hollyhock God> I mean, god, nobody complains when Dreams tries to fix problems with dreams.

<Hollyhock God> Miranda, your shields fixation is OUT OF CONTROL.

<Dreams> "So how do you know that Praxael is a Mimic, given that you claim to have no proof whatsoever?"

<Dreams> "Or Maxiel, even, for that matter?"

<Cyrus> "How exactly does one 'fix' this?"

<Hollyhock God> The empty suit shrugs. "How do you know whether you're asleep or not?"

<Miranda> (Ah. Here we go. Marley: Last To Die.)

<Dan> "I think you spin a top."

<Miranda> ("Who'll be the last to die for a mistake?!")

<Hollyhock God> "As for fixing it, you could try the program I worked on with Maxiel."

<Dreams> "Actually, it's a very good question that a lot of people don't know the answer to."

<Hollyhock God> "I started locating suitable Nobles for her and then went to a great deal of trouble to trick her into choosing them."

<Miranda> "You're telling us you're the person who permanently crippled Maxiel?"

<Dan> (What's wrong with Maxiel? I don't remember.)

<Hollyhock God> "Crippled? Oh, no, she's just like that. But she used to be a lot more tricksy and dangerous than she is today."

<Miranda> (Sleeepy angel is sleeeepy.)

<Hollyhock God> "If I'm luckier than I deserve, maybe her servants will even be able to fix her someday. Not that they realize that's what they're doing."

<Miranda> (Does she have the kind of Aspect a crazy master plan like that takes?)

<Hollyhock God> "But as you may have noticed, her Nobles are well above the average for being pure incarnations of service to their Estate."

<Hollyhock God> As Miranda knows, you don't need Aspect to make your plans crazy.

<Dreams> "Look, Marley, I'm sorry, but you realize the reason we were all worried about Miranda is that her plans were gradually shifting towards 'kill everyone that gets in my way', right? Surely you see the similarities here?"

<Miranda> (Miranda's master plan may not be a great example here.)

<Hollyhock God> "That kind of purity flows backwards along the Imperator-Noble link… what? Well, okay, yes, killing everybody isn't always the best plan."

  • Miranda rolls her eyes.

<Hollyhock God> "I would really appreciate not having to murder you. That would be just great."

<Miranda> "Lady, there is nothing pure about some of her Nobles."

<Miranda> "Not that you could, mind."

<Miranda> "Murder me. I mean."

<Hollyhock God> Marley raises an eyebrow. Although you can't see that because she's a suit.

<Dreams> "Ladies, ladies. Let's not play the game of who could murder who."

<Miranda> (Oh, sure, Dreams prevents us from settling that again! I sense a pattern!)

<Hollyhock God> "I think you have an overly-restricted definition of what constitutes pure."

<Hollyhock God> To be pure is to be dedicated to the principles of your Estate and to Creation, and to embody the meaning of your Estate in every moment of your life."

<Hollyhock God> "You and I perhaps, are not so pure."

<Miranda> "It is not the intrinsic nature of Lightning to be an infuriating prick."

<Dan> "Wouldn't a loose definition of pure be rather oxymoronic?"

<Miranda> ("Uh… pure…ish…")

<Hollyhock God> "Really? That sounds exactly like what lightning feels like."

<Dan> ("This definition is 78% the definition of pure, and 22% of other words.")

<Hollyhock God> "Also I think you're failing to be objective about Noel's character, but we don't have to go into that."

<Dreams> "So. What would it take to convince you not to attempt to murder all of us? Even Miranda?"

<Hollyhock God> "Mind you, if people couldn't be blinded by their preconceptions I wouldn't have been able to trick Maxiel into enNobling them, so it's just as well."

<Miranda> "Apparently if we turn against, and attempt to kill our Imperator."

<Hollyhock God> "That pretty much sums it up."

<Dreams> "Remember what I said about plans that involve murdering people who we're not supposed to murder?"

<Hollyhock God> "Well, I can't make you believe me, but maybe you'll see something that will change your minds someday. Let me know if that happens. If you're still around."

<Miranda> "Did you seriously expect to just waltz in here and play on our insecurities to drive us to deicide?"

<Hollyhock God> "No. Not really. But giving you this warning is going to let me feel a lot better about what I'm going to do next."

<Hollyhock God> Marley shrugs again, with such expressiveness that the suit collapses into a pile of dirty laundry.

<Cyrus> "…"

<Miranda> "Right. Well. We need to stop her, obviously."

<Hollyhock God> There is a slight popping noise as the connection dies.

<Cyrus> "How and from doing what, exactly?"

<Miranda> "Honestly, I was so looking forward to just taking a day off and tending to my Estate. And my laundry."

<Miranda> "Not sure. Can you poison her plans?"

<Dan> "They say when your clothes can stand up on their own, that's when you should be doing laundry, yes."

<Cyrus> "I can poison plants, yeah."

<Miranda> "Plans, dear. Not plants."

<Cyrus> "Oh, those are harder."

<Dreams> "Hmmm."

<Dreams> "To be fair, it's not entirely unreasonable to investigate her claims."

<Miranda> "And if she wasn't Death, hadn't just threatened us, and had even bothered trying to persuade us of her claims, I'd take them a lot more seriously. As it is, we need to consider ourselves under attack from her, more or less."

<Dreams> "Well, yes, I have considered that she could be lying to us in an effort to preserve the sanctity of her estate. But I've also considered that rituals that bring Imperators back from the dead… well, there is that precedent."

<Dreams> "Actually, that's a good idea. We should just catch an Excrucian and get them to tell us how to perform the Mimic-creating Rite, and compare notes."

<Miranda> "Ananda."

<Dreams> "Probably be easier than opening Praxael up and seeing if there's any hideous blasphemies lurking within."

<Miranda> "Ananda gave the order."

<Dreams> "According to… Marley, if I recall correctly?"

<Miranda> "If Maxiel is an Excrucian raised through this rite, Ananda knows about it. At the very least, he knows why he gave the kill-order."

<Miranda> "Yes. But someone Ananda-shaped was pushing for that. I could feel Entropy's dogs closing in before the ritual completed."

<Hollyhock God> EDITOR'S NOTE: In His Last Miracle Issue #73, to be exact!

<Miranda> ("Oh! Joktan! Didn't see you standing there. Didn't mean a dog exactly. Uh. But maybe a nice dog. Not nice-nice, but regal-nice. Like, a Malamut or a well bred Collie or something… not that I'd compare you to Lassie or… uh… ohgodkillme…")

<Dan> "Well, gentle readers, why don't we go talk to Ananda, then?"

<Miranda> "…that's way less exciting than breaking into his dreamscape, but OK."

<Miranda> "Also, I can't really leave.

<Dreams> "Well, technically, Praxael has asked us to stay put while he 'deals with' the issue of somebody Ananda-shaped trying to have us all killed."

<Miranda> "Me."

<Miranda> "Not us."

<Dan> So we'll ask forgiveness later.

  • Miranda glares at Dan.

<Dreams> ("our father-angel has instructed you all to remain in the Chancel while he sorts out the whole business with your death warrant.")

<Dreams> (You all.)

<Miranda> (Yes. But they weren't trying to have us all killed.)

<Hollyhock God> Well, once Praxcrucian kills you all for disobedience, you can arrange to be replaced by a shining incarnation of service!

  • Miranda isn't buying the Praxcrucian stuff.

<Dan> Doesn't our duty to the War come before our duty to our imperator?

<Dan> I seem to recall something like that.

<Hollyhock God> Or the bits about shining incarnations of service, either, I note.

<Miranda> "Other way around."

<Dreams> "I'm pretty sure it's actually the exact opposite, yes."

<Cyrus> "But if he's a Mimic, is he still our Imperator?"

<Hollyhock God> Although Noel is probably the least good example out of the three.

<Dreams> "Well, that depends on what you mean by 'our Imperator'."

<Miranda> "He's not a Mimic."

<Dan> I think part of being a Mimic is that you have to not be the original.

<Miranda> "Do you believe everything your death-riddled clothing tells you?

<Dan> "The issue has yet to come up."

<Miranda> "Oh. Right. You're new. Keep forgetting."

<Dreams> "Well, it occurs to me, if we do capture an Excrucian and learn the Rite of Anguish, being able to demonstrate the differences would help disproving Marley's claims to others as well."

<Dan> "Assuming there aren't just two Mimic-rites."

<Dreams> "I guess we wouldn't even need to capture the Excrucian, really."

  • Hollyhock God wonders vaguely how long everyone wants the conversation to go on before he does things.

<Dan> (Until after I get back from getting my laundry out of the dryer, which I'm leaving to do right now. >_> )

<Miranda> No!

<Miranda> Dan!

<Miranda> It's a trap!

<Hollyhock God> Now I shall take a quick survey: who finds Marley's warnings potentially convincing, in-character, at the present moment?

<Miranda> Miranda thinks… I refuse to believe that Duchess Whitsunday Fine is acting as a positive influence on ANYONE.

<Cyrus> (Potentially convincing, yeah.)

<Dreams> I'm at the very least going to look into them.

<Dreams> In fact, I shall start a Project! "How I determined whether or not Praxael is a Mimic."

<Dreams> Anyone else is welcome to sign on and make it a group Project.

<Hollyhock God> Bubble #1: Go over and ask him. If yes, success!

<Miranda> Miranda has some doubts, but they're tied to self-doubt about this thing, and DAMN that's an inconvenient thing to believe. But she's determined not to believe her, so she doesn't. Also, Marley's actions don't make sense.

<Hollyhock God> We'll call it a Revelation.

<Dreams> Actually, yes.

<Dreams> Once I see him again.

<Miranda> No, you need 5 more.

<Hollyhock God> It's also a Victory.

<Miranda> You need to fail a divination.

<Miranda> Then you can ask him.

<Hollyhock God> As for the Duchess, you need to consider what "pure incarnation of service and of their Estate" means.

<Hollyhock God> All the various hedonistic things Rhys does, for example, still count as service to his Estate.

<Hollyhock God> From a certain point of view. /obi-wan

<Miranda> No, Rhys I buy.

<Miranda> Noel doesn't make sense since his nature is unperturbable, calm. But Miranda is so not objective there.

<Miranda> Definitionally, in fact.

<Miranda> It's technically a law of nature.

<Hollyhock God> I am also delighted by the description of him as an "infuriating prick" because that's exactly how an immortal would describe a lightning strike.

<Miranda> :)

<Cyrus> :D

<Hollyhock God> I ought to do more to play up Noel's habit of being unflappable and then exploding into instantaneous motion, preferably while you aren't looking.

<Miranda> So, I've had a lot of attention, maybe we can let Dreams drive for the investigation?

<Hollyhock God> Yes, we are putting Miranda in time-out while the non-crazy Familia members take point.

<Hollyhock God> Dreams, catch that Mimic!

<Hollyhock God> Or non-Mimic!

<Miranda> Dude, Dreams is not the non-crazy Familia members.

<Dan> (I'll sign on to that Project.)

<Dreams> "Right. First, we're going to need waffles."

<Hollyhock God> His madness is orthogonal to the current difficulty.

<Cyrus> "Giant ones?"

<Dreams> "If you prefer. I was just talking about getting something to eat while we discuss our options."

<Hollyhock God> Man, I remember back in the day when Dreams turned people into dogs just for talking to him.

<Hollyhock God> You've come a long way, baby.

<Dan> Maybe he's planning on turning us into waffles now.

<Dreams> Technically, you turned him into a dog just for talking to me! The Affliction is entirely within your power as HG.

<Dreams> And Lesser Enchantments entirely within its scope.

<Dreams> Should you desire to turn my fellow PCs into waffles.

<Hollyhock God> Waffles fall out of the ceiling into Dreams' outstretched arms!

<Hollyhock God> Waffles are topologically isomorphic to dogs, anyway.

<Dreams> "So. Comparing the Rite of Anguish with the ritual Miranda found. Killing Praxael and seeing if he unleashes a hideous blasphemy into the world. We could try to be clever and use the shard of Imperator-soul within us to determine if Praxael has significantly changed. Any other suggestions?"

  • Dreams assumes this is away from Miranda, or he wouldn't make that second suggestion.

<Dan> (Waffles are not topologocially equivalent to dogs, dogs are torii of one hole, waffles are solids.)

  • Miranda is busily fuming and tending to the well-being of shields in the world. Someone is making net-resistant mosquitos? WTF? No, this will not stand…

<Hollyhock God> I guess that settles it!

<Dreams> "Hmm. Figure out if Maxiel is a Mimic or not. I mean, if we did, that'd be… pretty conclusive."

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, Praxael rides triumphantly home on a seven-legged steed.

<Cyrus> "Is that normal?"

<Hollyhock God> "Greetings, everyone!"

<Dreams> "Maybe there's some way to open them up and see inside their heart and soul without…"

  • Dreams namastes.

<Miranda> (Praxiel = Farnsworth!)

<Dreams> (No, that would be "Good news, everyone!")

<Dreams> ("I've convinced the Council of Four to only kill some of you!")

<Miranda> (They were only ever trying to kill me. You were totally cool.)

<Hollyhock God> ("Good news, everyone! I've decided to betray Creation!"

<Hollyhock God> "Bad news, everyone. I couldn't convince the Council of Four not to kill Miranda."

<Hollyhock God> "So… she's pretty much going to have to stay here in the Chancel. Forever."

<Miranda> Am I there now?

<Hollyhock God> I hope so!

<Miranda> "My Lord; that appears as though it will undermine my efficacy in protecting my Estate. Does that mean I should be replaced?"

  • Miranda takes a deep breath.

<Hollyhock God> "I could never replace my favorite little girl; don't you worry."

<Hollyhock God> "We just need to get some really good dirt on them all."

<Miranda> (Is he still Imperator of Secrets?)

<Hollyhock God> Not today!

<Miranda> (Grr.)

<Hollyhock God> "I feel like for some reason knowing people's secrets ought to be natural to me. Not sure why."

<Hollyhock God> "Oh, on that topic. I was nosing around the Cityback before our meeting, and it looks like Ananda keeps a diary!"

<Hollyhock God> "So I need you to sneak in there and steal it. Is tomorrow good?"


<Cyrus> "That sounds… suicidal. What the hell, I've been a bit bored."

<Dreams> "We're actually a little busy trying to determine if you're a Mimic or not."

<Dreams> "But we could probably fit it in!"

<Hollyhock God> Praxael looks shifty. "Did somebody say I was?"

<Miranda> "I'm sorry, back up…"

<Dan> "Very smooth, Dreams."

<Hollyhock God> "I am so totally not a Mimic."

<Hollyhock God> "See, there's no stars in my eyes."

<Cyrus> "That's just what a Mimic would say!"

<Dreams> "The question has been raised."

<Dreams> "Ah. Of course. Should have thought of that."

<Miranda> "Hold on there a second… that doesn't make sense at all!…"

<Miranda> "Since when was Ananda a 14-year-old girl?"

<Hollyhock God> "Well, Ananda's true nature is veiled from sight until the Fourth Age comes. If that ever happens."

<Hollyhock God> "Which of course it will."

<Hollyhock God> "Hoo hoo hoo."

<Dan> "I wonder if you could force that to work the other way. Reveal Ananda's true nature and thus cause the start of the Fourth Age."

<Miranda> "Post hoc, ergo propter hoc."

<Miranda> "Should work."

<Hollyhock God> "It would certainly be hilarious. Let's do that, then."

<Miranda> …is he usually this giggly?

<Hollyhock God> "Okay, so tomorrow, you steal Ananda's diary and then we start the Fourth Age."

<Hollyhock God> "Hoo hoo hoo" isn't a giggle. It's more like a chuckle.

<Dan> (Also, Mimics don't have stars in their eyes)

<Hollyhock God> "Oh, right. Still not a Mimic."

<Hollyhock God> You seem to recall Praxael being whimsical! It's possible that it was easier to think of him as a father figure when he wasn't actually here?

<Dreams> "Yes. And clearly you're trying to convince us that you're not a Mimic by being spectacularly bad at convincing us that you're not a Mimic, whereas we would know a real Mimic would be almost impossible to detect."

<Hollyhock God> I was kind of hoping people would do a bunch of callbacks to retroactively define what Praxael was like, but nobody did.

<Hollyhock God> "Oh, Dreams. Nobody understands my logic but you."

<Dreams> "I've never understood why."

<Hollyhock God> "I know, right?"

<Dan> (I could, but that would have been silly as it was retroactively established that I've never met him!)

<Miranda> (Well… I thought the father-figure bit was pretty obvious, implication-wise.)

<Dreams> (He's… wacky dad!)

<Dan> "This is all very Princess Bride, so when do we get to the iocane powder?"

<Miranda> (…shoulda let him stay dead.)

<Hollyhock God> Well, he's the angel of dreams. That makes him even more insane than Dreams is by default.

<Dreams> (And then a soul-shattering revelation occurs when you go into his bedroom and discover he's not actually that wacky.)

  • Hollyhock God cues "Hardlyquin".

<Dan> (So I can clearly not choose the Mimic in front of you!)

<Dreams> Also, Mercury.

<Hollyhock God> Mercury is actually Cyrus' own Estate.

<Dreams> Oh! Never mind, then.

<Hollyhock God> Although yeah, conceptual linkage.

<Miranda> Cyrus is an angel ascendant.

<Dreams> (I have to go call out from work, be back in a few minutes.)

<Hollyhock God> Praxael is concerned that you only have one Estate. An angel should be bigger! But that's a matter for another time.

<Cyrus> (Ooh, good point.)

<Cyrus> (I should start a Project to get a new Estate.)

<Hollyhock God> Actually, I should probably make "raid the Cityback" its own story. Maybe we should send Dreams off to work.

<Hollyhock God> Or just spend the entire evening making more Homestuck references.

<Miranda> ?

<Hollyhock God> I'm jonesing now that there won't be another update for months.

<Hollyhock God> AD, I think you'd find that this campaign has an entire other layer to it that only those of us familiar with my constant Homestuck jokes will get.

<Miranda> Whatever.

<Dan> (I feel like I'm missing out somehow, despite having read Homestuck.)

  • Hollyhock God has been trying to figure out what needs to be done to get the magic that creates so much Homestuck fanart to work for Nobilis.

<Miranda> So: the session so far: Marley has spread vicious lies about Prax, and also we need to blackmail Ananda.

<Hollyhock God> And I've finally realized that the answer is: SHIPPING.

<Hollyhock God> We need to start shipping the canonical Nobles as hard as possible.

<Dan> (But normal shipping or troll shipping?)

<Hollyhock God> We must explore every avenue.

<Miranda> ("Oh, Ianthe! You are without flaw! Except, of course, the name, but that's a totally different issue!" cried Genseric.)

<Miranda> (Then she punched him in the face.)

<Dan> (Miranda could proabably use some moiraillegiance.)

<Hollyhock God> Mr. Hussie has gotten way ahead of us by inventing entirely new types of romance for people to ship his characters with.

<Miranda> (Moirwhatnow?)

<Hollyhock God> That's incredibly cunning.

<Hollyhock God> Oh, dear. It's time for…


<Miranda> …we're done here, then?

<Hollyhock God> Oh, there's no escape.

<Hollyhock God> I need you to draw all the shipping art.

<Hollyhock God> Mr. Bridges!

<Hollyhock God> Please explain matespritship!

<Hollyhock God> First! Rook ♦ Marsiglio.

<Miranda> I'm sure Diane and Edward would have something to say about that.

<Cyrus> Ianthe ♦ Joktan.

<Dreams> (It does seem our HG has descended into silliness levels completely inconducive to play.)

<Dan> Matespritship is the closest analogue to traditional human romance, though of the passionate and enflamed sort.

<Miranda> OK, then.

<Dreams> (Also, Walking Eye ♦ Lirrane Adrimorphous)

<Hollyhock God> How do you describe auspicticization in chat? And which names go first?

<Hollyhock God> Oh, Memory and Falling Stars is totally a kismesisitude.

<Miranda> Is it not enough that there's a Project for winning the love of the Lexiarchos Caducine in 3e?

<Hollyhock God> No, we need to encourage a critical mass of fanworks.

<Hollyhock God> Jenna ♣ Coriander/Genseric.

<Miranda> Bbbut I'm supposed to be making iiiiicons!

<Dan> The chat versions are ♥, ♦, ♣, and ♠.

<Hollyhock God> Yes, but does the auspicetice go first?

<Miranda> ?

<Dan> It's between the names.

<Hollyhock God> So it's Genseric ♣ Jenna ♣ Coriander?

<Dan> Yeah.

<Hollyhock God> Oh, okay.

<Hollyhock God> Now I need Mr. Dreams to explain moirallegiance.

<Miranda> Do you want me to ask Jenna about Chuubo's playtesting for you?

<Hollyhock God> No, we've already spoken about it.

<Hollyhock God> We'll get on it whenever all the mechanics stuff is done.

<Dan> What is Chuubo, anyway?

<Miranda> He's a Wishing Boy.

<Hollyhock God> Chuubo is a setting book for Nobilis, currently in progress.

<Miranda> Or possibly a River Dragon.

<Dan> Ah, cool.

<Hollyhock God> Or an Aaron's Serpent.

<Miranda> He may or may not have glasses.

<Dan> Is change typically thrown at wishing boys?

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, we need to figure out how to include major shipping potential in all future Nobilis products.

<Hollyhock God> Wishing Boy ♦ Prodigy?

<Hollyhock God> Or is this a ♥ situation?

<Miranda> The cannonical OTP is Prodigy ♦ [REDACTED BY HG].

<Miranda> …DAMMIT.

<Hollyhock God> No, I'm the one who's furious, because I don't know who that is.

  • Dreams needs to reread his brief spoiler-thing that came with the Nobilis playtest draft.

<Hollyhock God> Although I can probably tell you most of his/her qualities just based on tropes.

<Dreams> That's what's-his-name, the cool kid, isn't it?

<Miranda> No. I am mad at myself for not being good with keeping my mouth shut.

  • Dreams remembers there being some sort of half-fairy high-school-paper-reporter, as well?

<Miranda> I'm going to just not say anything further on the subject today.

<Dreams> And the Loneliest Strategist. You just want to give him a hug!

<Cyrus> Alright, I'm gonna head out. Have fun folks

<Hollyhock God> Fine, then Dreams will continue explaining moirallegiance.

<Hollyhock God> Wait, who do we ship Lord Entropy with?

<Miranda> [REDACTED].

<Cyrus> Jill, the lady who owns the candy store

<Miranda> [REDACTED] Entropy.

<Hollyhock God> Is it Entropy ♦ Ananda or Entropy ♠ Ananda?

<Cyrus> Anyways, later.

<Miranda> I'm logging off now.

<Hollyhock God> We're going to ship you while you're gone!

<Miranda> Goodnight.

<Hollyhock God> Just see if we don't :()

<Hollyhock God> I mean, :)

<Hollyhock God> Goddammit these emoticons will drive me MAD.

<Hollyhock God> Anyway, next week we raid the Cityback.

<Miranda> Dude, I wrote Miranda <!> Noel onto my damned character sheet.

<Hollyhock God> Good times.

<Dreams> Good night! If you're in Irene-path, good luck!

<Dreams> Miranda as Noel's moirail makes a fair amount of sense, actually.

<Miranda> Right.

<Miranda> Moirwh?

<Dreams> Oh, for…


<Dreams> (Not really.)

<Hollyhock God> I think Noel would be Miranda's moirail, not the other way round.

<Dreams> Miranda's the one killing Death and everybody else.

<Dreams> Clearly she needs to be kept in line far more than the other way around.

<Hollyhock God> Yes, that's why Noel soothes her, so he's the moirail and they are in moirallegiance with each other.

<Dreams> I thought the person being soothed was the moirail. It's been a while.

<Hollyhock God> Hm, "A troll is compelled by fate to watch over their moirail and keep them in line."

<Hollyhock God> Maybe I'm wrong.

<Dan> Dreams is right.

<Hollyhock God> Mind you, only some moirallegiances are one way.

<Hollyhock God> Nepeta ♦ Equius goes both directions.

<Dan> True.

<Dan> But Karkat is no one's moirail.

<Dan> Actually, I don't know, did Gamzee ever calm him down?

<Dan> It's been a while since we had non-homicidal Gamzee, I forget.

<Hollyhock God> …it's the other way around.

<Dan> Well, trollicidal, I guess.

<Hollyhock God> You didn't see?

<Dan> I saw Karkat calm Gamzee down, I thought.

<Hollyhock God> "And the Knight of Blood so embraced the Bard of Rage, and in each other's arms they were aquiver. And with righteous pap and blessed shoosh he did quell his brother's fury. For the Knight looked upon his Bard all acting up and completely losing his shit and he did resolve to calmeth his juggalo ass right the fuck down. And so calmed down his juggalo ass was and would continueth to be for all time. And the Knight in totally settling a murderous clown's ludicrous shit down proper said, Let there be Moirallegiance: and it was so. And between moirails would flow bounteous mirth, and they did hug bumpeth plentifully, and honks of reconciliation echoed far and true into the darkness upon the face of the deep."

<Dan> Yeah, Karkat calmed Gamzee down.

<Hollyhock God> All has proceeded as Nepeta foresaw!

<Dan> That makes Gamzee the Moirail.

<Dreams> "Between moirails" kind of suggests a two-way.

<Dan> True.

<Hollyhock God> Well, Nepeta always had them downs as moirails, mostly with Gamzee soothing Karkat.

<Hollyhock God> It just turned out to be mostly the other way round.

<Hollyhock God> I still miss David ♠ Remus.

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